Are you actively trying? Or still on the fence, why?
we are actively trying. Had my IUD taken out in August. We decided that I don't have great pregnancies and that age would not help any so better off now than waiting.

Are you facing any conception barriers?
Not so far as I know. I tend to conceive very easily. I bought some ovulation tests for my last pregnancy to start using when I had my next cycle. Just ended up using the pregnancy test out of the box because my next cycle never came. Might want to find those for this month. I'm sure they are in a drawer somewhere.

What are you finding most stressful this time around?
Not wanting to tell anyone that we are trying or when we get pregnant. My mother is very much not in favor of that idea.

What's your TTC plan?
Well I met with our Dr. who said that I should only aim for 32 weeks due to my history but would really like to make it to 35. There are no MFM in my area but I may make the two hour drive anyway. I really like the Dr. that delivered me at the other hospital. Other than that I feel that it will probably happen in october. I took some vacation time and am off for 2.5 weeks. Much needed

Are you working with your doctor about a pregnancy plan? We have no plan persee. My current Dr. will no longer be delivering babies, so when I become pregnant he will refer me to one of his partners and I will develop a plan at that time. He did answer some general answers about the practice and stated that I would be monitored much closer this go round. Which I am glad. I switched to this practice after my last pregnancy went so badly. My sister used these Dr.s and they were overall much more attentive.

How are you feeling. No really, how are you feeling about this?
WEll I figure that I am 2 for 2 for my pregnancies with pre. I am much more proactive now than in the begining. And my husband has figured out not to listen to me that I am fine. He will be monitoring my blood pressures as well and will not miss any Dr.'s apointments this go round. I figure that I will get sick again, but the life situation that I am in is much more stable and less stressful. It's just a matter of how far I will make it this time. And this will be the last one for us. Three will be plenty.

I haven't said much lately and it is because I have been spending WAY too much time in my head. This is all I think about so it is nice to see someone come along and shake us all up once in a while. Thank you, lady!!

Are you actively trying? Or still on the fence, why?
Well, I thought I might be ready this month but things popped up and put a stop to that. I just finished with my visit from AF, so needless to say nothing is going on for us. And because things didn't go as planned I back pedaled and decided it is too soon to try. I feel very fragile and I am trying to work it out but I keep hitting road blocks, so yes, I am sitting on the fence.


Are you facing any conception barriers?
Nope. Thirty days after I delivered I went right back to the regularity and consistency I have known my whole life. Every 28 to 30 days it is like clock work. I haven't done any ovulation kits but the Doc said if they are that regular he has no concern that I am not ovulating. I guess I am glad that it came back quickly.

What are you finding most stressful this time around?
So many things. I am 38 and that means the clock is ticking really loud. I am afraid we won't be successful conceiving. And when we do, what is next, being scared that I will have PE again. On top of the PE scare there are all the other possible bad outcomes at my age. My biggest fear is that WE WILL NEVER HAVE A CHILD. I feel crazy because this subject is all I think about.


What's your TTC plan?
When I feel ready we will try. Like I said, thought I would be ready this month or next, now I am thinking about postponing until January or February. I can't do it in December because that is when we conceived Fritzy and I just can't do it.

Are you working with your doctor about a pregnancy plan?
Yes. I have had meetings with my MFM's and my OB. They have cleared me to try whenever I am ready. As soon as we know we are pregnant, I am supposed to call the MFM and they will see me right away. I was told that I will see them more at first and OB less and then switch as it gets to the end. I will be on two 40 mg shots of lovenox. I am already taking LDA, and folgard, as well as my prenatal, calcium, and vitamin D. I will deliver between 37 and 38 weeks depending on how things are going.


How are you feeling. No really, how are you feeling about this?
I felt a lot better after I saw my MFM in July and she said I had APS. It gave us something to work with. Then, I went to see my OB and he was not as cheery. I realize PE could happen again but I am optimistic that it won't. But after seeing OB I have had some setbacks. I just relive my delivery over and over again and it just scares me. I feel paralyzed by this fear and I am sick of it. That's why, Jasmin, I am glad you posted this because this is the only place where people really understand the seriousness of PE and HELLP.

Thanks, Jasmine for rounding us up!

[b]Are you actively trying? Or still on the fence, why?[/b]
We have been actively trying since January of this year. I got pregnant on the first try, but then unfortunately miscarried in March (blighted ovum). After the obligatory 2-month waiting time (it seemed endless), we started again and are still trying. Currently I am on day 11 in my 5th cycle of TTC.

[b]Are you facing any conception barriers?[/b]
Before conceiving Henry (spontaneously), we were "diagnosed" with unexplained infertility, which turned out to be a blockage that nobody could see/find for the longest time. Since this has been removed, it is not a issue. At this point I am getting a bit nervous about my age. I turned 39 and my fertility rate is declining. Because of this, I have set up a consult with an RE this coming Monday. I asked my MFM with whom he likes to work, so I am sure they "get along". My MFM just said "no multiples", and the RE I am going to see is apparently not as "aggressive" in her approach (As much as I want a baby, I don't want to become octomom, this would be way too much placenta:-)). So let's see what we'll get to hear this Monday.

[b]What are you finding most stressful this time around?[/b]
At this point I am scared to remain without a living child. I am worried, upset and sad that it still has not happened for us. Not only does it seem so difficult to conceive (we've been trying in total for 5 years to have children), there is the fear of yet another miscarriage, developing PE, losing another baby or worst, never having any more children.


[b]What's your TTC plan?[/b]
We have an appointment with an RE on Monday, to see what the next steps are. TTC on our own for another while, IUI, IVF...who knows.

[b]Are you working with your doctor about a pregnancy plan?[/b]
I have had two preconception appointments with my MFM since we lost Henry. I have seen him in February when I was "brieflly" pregnant. I'd be seeing only him throughout the entire pregnancy, rather than alternating with my OB (all involved are ok wiht this set-up) and it makes it easier for me as well. I am already taking Vit D, Calcium, and folic acid. Once I test positive I should add LDA to the "pill mix". I'd have to do a repeat c-section, as I got the classical kind the first time around, so no vbac for me, which is fine.

[b]How are you feeling. No really, how are you feeling about this?[/b]
Since we have an appointment on Monday, I feel better. Trying to have a family for the past 5 years has worn me out, add PE and losing a child into that mix and it has become exhaustion. So I am pretty anxious for different reasons, but I am still hopeful, so keep your fingers crossed for me, will ya?

Thanks for starting this up. We have had a crazy couple of months. We moved to a bigger house, in part so we could have another kid. Now, we are so worn out with moving, work, and everything else that we are back on the fence.
So TTCers, it's roll call time:

[b]Are you actively trying? Or still on the fence, why?[/b]
I live on the fence. At first, I was just scared out of my mind. We worked through some stuff with a bunch of doctors and found no underlying conditions or risk factors. I have a lot of faith in my doctor, but my body just sucks. I have my fifth case of shingles in two years. Now, I think I have to get the vaccine, so I have to wait to get healthy, then wait three months before we TTC. This also means that I am not handling the stress I already have in my life very well. I wasn't stressed last time (really too sick to care about anything), but I am afraid to add to my stress baseline right now.
We might try this winter. In good news, I have lost 16 lbs and gotten back to nearly pre-pregnancy shape.

[b]Are you facing any conception barriers?[/b]
No. It took a few months last time, but I think that is normal after years of the pill. We will see how it goes next time.

[b]What are you finding most stressful this time around?[/b]
The idea of me dying stresses both of us out. I am not afraid, but I will be really freaking mad if I lose that time with my daughter. My husband doesn't want to deal with my angry ghost... The idea of keeping myself healthy and not losing another two years to this crappy disease stresses me out. I had the easiest and most pleasant baby in the world, and I was too sick to enjoy her first year. I don't want to do that again. I could do without another round of PPD too.

[b]What's your TTC plan?[/b]
Prenatals, calcium, and trying to have faith that things could be ok.

[b]Are you working with your doctor about a pregnancy plan?[/b]
I did discuss a little bit of a plan with my doctor. She didn't want to make any decisions until we get there, and I think that is the right thing to do in my case. I am on the edge of "advanced maternal age". I can't decide if I should just wait the extra month and be automatically high risk or leave that designation up to chance. It would eliminate some arguments with my insurance company. My doctor didn't really think losing weight would help me much, but she agreed that "getting in fighting shape" couldn't hurt. I believe that my pregnancy was a failed "stress-test" and a wake-up call to start taking care of myself and get healthy. My BP is still higher than it was pre-pregnancy, so I wouldn't be surprised if I end up having to deal with that at some point. I didn't discuss it with her at my previous appointments because I thought it would go down if I got the weight off. We will end up talking about it at my first appointment or next checkup.

[b]How are you feeling. No really, how are you feeling about this?[/b]
I really want my daughter to have a sibling. I am not sure that she will have a biological sibling, but there will be another child. I am really anxious about getting pregnant again, and I don't know how I pulled off a four month maternity leave and still functioned at work last time. The work thing will be okay, but it will be harder this time. I worry about bedrest and going insane with a toddler and a full-time job. I am afraid of bringing home another preemie with a preschooler in the house. All normal stuff.
The women on this site always remind me of some very important things. 1) we got super lucky and had an excellent outcome eventually, 2) the next pregnancy might be easier, 3) It is okay to have a "healthy-mom/healthy-baby" or "just get us out of here alive" type pregnancy and birth plan. It helps me worry a little less and feel better about trying again later this year.

Hey Everyone,
I haven't really been on here lately, things have gotten busy on my end so I've been lurking more than anything. I am so happy to hear that so many of the women on here are having healthy pregnancies and babies (especially after a loss), it warms my heart that there is so much hope and happiness for the future.

[b]Are you actively trying? Or still on the fence, why?[/b]
We were told by one of our doctors that we could start trying 8 months postpartum, which falls in October. Now that October is so close, it feels terrifying. When we were told that it was the Spring so October just sounded like a pipe dream, now it's a reality and it's daunting. I guess we will see how next month feels and if we decide we are ready then we are going to go for it.

[b]Are you facing any conception barriers?[/b]
Not that I know of. I got pregnant with Aiden after the 1st try so it was joked that I was just like my mom…who could "get pregnant if you coughed on her". There is part of me that is worried that it won't be that way the 2nd time, which adds even more stress to the situation. Also, my cycles have been kind of crazy since Aiden so that might end up playing a factor in trying this time around.

[b]What are you finding most stressful this time around?[/b]
Right now, it is a lot of fear of the unknown. I'm afraid of how I'm going to react to being pregnant again, right now I can only picture myself crying hysterically (not because its not what I want but more because I still miss him and its going to be hard to reconcile the two things). Also, I have a fear of getting pregnant and people acting like Aiden was never here and they can go on like it is my first pregnancy and first baby. I am, of course, petrified of losing another baby, that just comes with the territory...but I honestly don't think I could go through that twice. Like Jasmin said, I am actually not afraid for myself at all (although I feel like that can't be normal), I was never really afraid for myself in general though...my only priority was that Aiden would have long enough to stand a fighting chance.

[b]What's your TTC plan?[/b]
We are just going to try it naturally (without any temp-ing, ovulation kits, etc..) and see how it goes. I am going to be starting LDA as soon as I can get to the store and buy some and I will go back on the prenatal pills at the same time. I plan on shopping around for ANOTHER mfm this month so hopefully we will find one that we like and can stick with.

[b]Are you working with your doctor about a pregnancy plan?[/b]
I have my OB already but I still need to find an MFM that I feel comfortable with. I was told by two MFMs already that I should try LDA, so that’s a definite. I have been looking into Lovenox as an option but so far none of the doctors but my OB agree with a need for it. I was told by one MFM that they would let me get to full term (which seems ridiculous considering my Classical C Section), and the other one said 37 weeks. I’ll have a better idea of a plan once I choose a MFM to manage my care.

[b]How are you feeling. No really, how are you feeling about this?[/b]
Mostly sad and scared. I really wish I could say “hopeful and excited” but I’m just not there yet. I wish that I could have a healthy happy 7 month old in my arms right now instead of making the decision to try again. I do feel like we are still ready to be parents and we have so much love to give that not trying again never seemed like an option. I also feel like there is never going to be a time that feels “perfect” to try again….so here goes nothing…or everything.

First... Jasmine, I'm so happy for you. I've been away for 5 months or so and just this week started lurking the boards again and was so ecstatic to see your pregnancy going so well. It's needed inspiration! You and Jean... it's awesome. You're on the home stretch.

Are you actively trying? Or still on the fence, why?
This is day 17 of our first month trying again! It's been almost 6 months since we miscarried *sigh*... which is around the time I started working again. The distraction has been healing, and at times I thought, "do I really want to go through this again?" I just finished my main assignment at work, so I'm no longer concerned about added stress of going MIA because of early delivery or other complications. I've had time to reflect on TTC again. I know it's something I have to do or I'll regret it.

Are you facing any conception barriers?
Thankfully no, only problems sustaining a pregnancy. We saw 2 huge cysts with my last pregnancy and my doctor was concerned. We even contemplated surgical removal of them. Ultrasound last month showed that the cysts were gone and all looks healthy. Yay!

What are you finding most stressful this time around?
The unknown is the most scary. We're used to getting curve balls. We've had 3 miscarriages, one was a cornual ectopic-the worst kind of ectopic-which was not only life threatening (especially on LDA, lovenox, and fish oil) but fertility threatening. Also, Daniel had 6 soft markers on ultrasound for Down Syndrome (he doesn't have it), but they were really signs of a tired worn out placenta which led us to pre-e and HELLP. It's always the last thing we expect when we get in there... the rare of the rare. So maybe "RARE" for me now would be a normal pregnancy?! Let's hope for that!

What's your TTC plan?
Pre-pregnancy, I'm taking prenatal, baby asprin, TL guard Rx (extra folic acid), and starting day 14 of the cycle (3 days ago) I'm adding 200mg of oral progesterone. Waiting to take progesterone supplements after a positive test doesn't seem to do the trick for me. I have MTHFR and we have strong evidence that I have a luteal phase defect causing a progesterone deficiency in early pregnancy, leading to miscarriage or shallow implantation (allegedly).

Are you working with your doctor about a pregnancy plan?
After a positive test and a confirmation ultrasound to make sure everything is off to a good start, I'll start daily lovenox injections. I'll probably also add Calcium, extra vitamin D, and fish oil to the daily pill buffet. I will also see an MFM in conjunction with my OB for regular growth scans, cord and placenta analysis, etc. I'm prepared for early bedrest if we have BP or growth issues (started at 25 weeks with Daniel). I would love to make it past 28 weeks, but would be ecstatic to make it to 32. I'm a VBAC candidate, but I'd probably go with another C-section to minimize the risk. That's way down the road.

How are you feeling. No really, how are you feeling about this?
Like it would be a miracle to have another child. Really. I've researched all I can and I know there's some things that I can do, but a lot that I can't do anything about. It seems that the 2nd time around is more often less severe, so I'm hopeful while also very guarded.

[quote="flori"]What are you finding most stressful this time around?
Even though we are not TTC yet, I have been researching drug costs. Turns out my insurance does not cover Lovenox and should I need it, it would be over $1200 a month out of pocket. I told DH about it, and we are both fine spending any amount of money, but it is still intimidating. I know that the experts say Lovenox is not the cure-all, but I would like to feel like I am doing everything possible.

How are you feeling. No really, how are you feeling about this?
I am absolutely terrified. I am terrified PCOS will keep me from getting pregnant. I am terrified of the cost of Lovenox. I am terrified of losing another baby. I am terrified of never having living children. I am terrified![/quote]

On the Lovenox and insurance, did you ask if that's for the Lovenox Brand, or the generic? My generic for Lovenox is basically $1 per shot ($30 a month). Enoxaparin Sodium is the generic name for it.

I think the fear is something that never completely goes away...even at 34 weeks. I have learned that thinking in absolutes (never, always, etc) completely stressed me out even more. My husband had to snap me out of that. I'm like chicken little. Any sign of something abnormal and I automatically yelled that the sky is falling. But I guess that's what why I'm so happy to have access to these boards.

[quote="holly3372@msn.com"]Hey,thanks for this! I am not trying as of yet. I have been on the fence about it. I am truly so scared to have to watch another baby go through even a moment of the nicu again. I am so lonely for my baby.I have seen many specialists and although none have said "Do not get pregnant again" all have warned that I am at greater risk of getting pre-e again. I have no underlying clotting disorders as far as any testing they have available all were negative. Some docs say lovenox,others say no. I am going to be 40 in march,with no children. Since I lost my son it has been very hard for me to stay motivated to care for myself.
Lately though I have been feeling this very faint glimmer of hope. I want to lose the extra weight I haven't taken of since pegnancy. I have a feeling once I do,it's going to happen, I am going to give it a go. I think January. I hope and pray.:)[/quote]


Initially I was also told to not try again. My current OB was the one who said that actually. But he said to get other opinions and that he would support our decision. He was scared for me to try again. I was too, but wanting a family to raise was just too strong a feeling to ignore. We went in knowing that my providers would not hesitate to end the pregnancy should problems arise. Luckily our plan seemed like the right one for us. I also have no underlying blood clotting disorders.

Thanks for this, Jasmine! I am a bit envious that the pregnant again board was so busy while us ttc'ers were mostly lurking. I think a bunch of us are waiting for various reason: weight loss, timing, etc but I'm hoping this board will pick up around the new year and we can all graduate to Pregnant Again. :)

Are you actively trying? Or still on the fence, why?
We are not actively trying. We use condoms most of the time, because I am scared to get pregnant and not be ready. I have not met with any MFMs but I did go in yesterday for preliminary bloodwork. After the results are in, I will finally select an OB and then go from there.

As far as timing, I want to wait until after the holidays. Working in retail is not fun during the holidays, especially since I run the front end- including the cashiers and return department. I was pregnant with Gracie last holiday season and my stress level was through the roof. I think starting TTC after the craziness has ended will be good for me.

Are you facing any conception barriers?
Like you I have PCOS. I have been ovulating with each cycle since my first postpartum period. I also have been temping until my last cycle (which ended up lasting 60ish days). When I finally got AF this month, I started temping again. I am keeping my fingers crossed that we can conceive Rainbow naturally.

What are you finding most stressful this time around?
Even though we are not TTC yet, I have been researching drug costs. Turns out my insurance does not cover Lovenox and should I need it, it would be over $1200 a month out of pocket. I told DH about it, and we are both fine spending any amount of money, but it is still intimidating. I know that the experts say Lovenox is not the cure-all, but I would like to feel like I am doing everything possible.

What's your TTC plan?
Well, after all of the blood work is in, I plan to arm myself with all of the knowledge I have learned here and consult with several MFMs. There is one who works with the OBGYN department at a university here that I am especially interested in meeting. Like I said earlier, I am hoping I will not need to see an RE.

So for now, while I wait for the holidays to pass, I am working on losing some weight. It's been up and down since Gracie died, but mostly down. Hopefully I can keep it going!

Are you working with your doctor about a pregnancy plan?
Not yet, but I will!

How are you feeling. No really, how are you feeling about this?
I am absolutely terrified. I am terrified PCOS will keep me from getting pregnant. I am terrified of the cost of Lovenox. I am terrified of losing another baby. I am terrified of never having living children. I am terrified!

Hey,thanks for this! I am not trying as of yet. I have been on the fence about it. I am truly so scared to have to watch another baby go through even a moment of the nicu again. I am so lonely for my baby.I have seen many specialists and although none have said "Do not get pregnant again" all have warned that I am at greater risk of getting pre-e again. I have no underlying clotting disorders as far as any testing they have available all were negative. Some docs say lovenox,others say no. I am going to be 40 in march,with no children. Since I lost my son it has been very hard for me to stay motivated to care for myself.
Lately though I have been feeling this very faint glimmer of hope. I want to lose the extra weight I haven't taken of since pegnancy. I have a feeling once I do,it's going to happen, I am going to give it a go. I think January. I hope and pray.:)