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So angry and upset

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Re: So angry and upset

Post by brianned5 » Mon Mar 19, 2012 10:55 am

I'm so sorry for your loss and how your doctor handled everything. I know I had preeclampsia for about 4 weeks before Kylie was
delivered. I was later diagnosed with severe preeclampsia and class I hellp. I was transferred to a better hospital and was put under and my daughter was delivered via classical c-section at 25 weeks. She lived 10 days. The delivering doctor made sure I was told about my verticle incision and also wrote it on all my discharge papers. I got pregnant a little less than 6 months later. My new doctor just told me I was absolutely not "allowed" to go into labor and they would deliver the baby at 36-37 weeks. I didn't have any problems and my second daughter was delivered at 36w3d. The doctor said my uterus looked really good and gave me the go ahead to have a third baby.

Post by Olliesmum » Mon Feb 20, 2012 12:35 am

Hi Missingmolly,

I too had an emergency c-section with my first due to pe resulting in a vertical insicion (J-shape after the initial bikini cut they couldnt get to him and extended to one side) I too was told under no circumstances was I to VBAC I have just had my second bub who is now 13 weeks old born at 38 weeks (by c-section) pe free. I am not sure if I am allowed to post this please delete it if I cant but there is a group of very special women whom have managed to vbac after a "special scar" just google special scars ~ special women and you will find all the support and information you may need I just wish I had found them sooner. My husband and I will be TTC once our little one is 3 and I will be advocating for my baby and my body, in an attempt to vbac. Of course at the end of the day a happy healthy little bundle to take home is all any of us want. I wish you all the very best in your journey to overcome your tradgedy and may you find happiness in the future.

Olliesmum.

Re: So angry and upset

Post by mom29 » Sun Jan 08, 2012 03:38 am

I'm so very sorry for your loss of Molly. Did you deliver at a hospital with a nicu ? At such an early gestational age it still might not have helped.

The OB I went to for 17+ years (and raved about) really dropped the ball in two of my pregnancies. I was so angry I didn't bother going back for the six week check-up. I was angry for a very long time.

It's going to take time for you to get past the anger, especially since your daughter died. I switched over to a mfm for the next pregnancy and it helped so much to have a doctor I trusted completely.

Please don't give up hope, your loss is still so recent.

Re: So angry and upset

Post by angieb » Mon Jan 02, 2012 09:42 am

Ah, that makes sense then why you weren't given the option, but you definitely should have been given the info. My ob made a very big deal about us knowing I had a classical c-section. I am really sorry that you had to go through that and that you found out about your incision this way. It hopefully won't cause an issue for your next pregnancy.

Re: So angry and upset

Post by MissingMolly » Mon Jan 02, 2012 01:53 am

Thank you for your response and for sharing your story, angieb. I'm happy to hear you had a successful, complication-free pregnancy after pre-e and classical c-section with your first.

I didn't have the option to be induced because my platelets were dropping too fast and my liver enzymes were out of control, so they were afraid that induction would take too long and that I might die before I could deliver. I also had to have general anesthesia and they gave me Versed, so I don't remember the first hour or so at all of my precious daughter's life. They actually didn't explain to me that she would be alive, so I only really and truly realized this when they pronounced her dead. The way they handled the whole thing was tragic.

I guess I reacted emotionally to the news about the vertical incision because it seems like the bad news keeps coming, and I'm angry that my previous doctor treated me so cavalierly. She ignored my concerns time and time again until it was too late, and then she didn't deign to explain something so important to my future to me. I'm having a hard time not hating her.

I'm just depressed about how so many cards are stacked against me. I so want a living child. And I desperately wish things had gone differently with my angel baby. I'll always wonder if she'd still be alive if I'd had a better doctor.
:cry:

Re: So angry and upset

Post by angieb » Mon Jan 02, 2012 12:53 am

By the way, my OB and MFM gave me the stats that *if you go into labor* (which they try to prevent by delivering early), the risk of uterine rupture is 10%. I did some of my own digging on the matter and what I could find indicated the risk was more like 1 to 3%, although I'm fine with having all future repeat c-sections so I didn't really try to press the issue.

Also, the amnio caused my water to break at about 1 am before my scheduled c-section with our son, and I actually did go into labor. They monitored us closely (I had eaten at 10 pm so they were weighing trying to wait till the food was out of my system vs. not letting me be in labor...at first they were going to wait until 7 am to deliver, but my contractions kept getting stronger and closer together and he ended up being born at 4:54 am instead...not really an emergency but "urgent"...my scar was fine even though I had been having pretty strong contractions- I was begging for that epidural.)

Re: So angry and upset

Post by angieb » Mon Jan 02, 2012 12:40 am

I had a classical c-section/vertical incision also. It was not really a big deal for my pregnancy with my son, except that he was born at 36+2 after an amnio to confirm lung maturity (but with mature lungs and at 7.4 lbs, he had no NICU time or issues and has never been really considered a preemie.) I had a regular c-section with him as they did not want to mess with my original incision (which apparently healed so well that my OB said she only knew it was there because she had delivered our daughter.) They have given me the okay to have another baby (which would be a 3rd c-section), and I'm hoping if all goes well another time, I might get the okay for one more. While it will get a little riskier with each c-section, I'm not really all that worried about it.

While the way you found out about it is certainly wrong, there isn't a whole lot of choice at 23 weeks. They usually *have* to do classical c-sections until 27ish weeks or so, the babies are still too small and not low enough for a regular c-section. So, the only alternative would have been to have an induction and vaginal birth, 23 weekers are usually too small to monitor during labor and delivery, and so if you had done that, your daughter very likely may have been stillborn. (We were actually given the choice to induce me with the acknowledgement that our daughter most likely would not be born alive, or a classical c-section-and the risks and issues of a vertical incision. We chose the classical c-section. One of the doctors I consulted with told me that she would have not given us the choice, that she would have "never allowed" me to have a c-section- I really resented that statement and did not go back to that doctor. I am really sorry that you were not given the option at least, I would have been very angry to later find out that I had not been given all of the information.)

Operative reports, in my experience, are not in the same records as regular OB medical records. I had to request that separately from the hospital when I was getting different consults. But my OB also made sure that I knew that I had had a vertical incision and made a very big deal about telling me that all future pregnancies would have to be c-sections, etc. That information definitely should have been given to you along the way.

(BTW, my second c-section was an extremely easy recovery. I wasn't even taking tylenol by the time I left the hospital, it wasn't a big deal at all. I personally much prefer c-sections over having a vaginal birth, although I guess I can't really compare since I've never had a vaginal birth.)

Re: So angry and upset

Post by kerisue » Sat Dec 31, 2011 02:19 am

Yep, I had a classical vertical c-sec too. I was told that this wasn't any impediment to future successful pregnancy, just that I'd have to wait longer to ttc and have another c-sec, no option for vbac. Not excited about being cut into again as I didn't feel c-sec was a good way to give birth and i'm sure it will bring back some of the trauma of the first birth, but if I end up with a healthy baby i'll deal with it. (of course I have to get pregnant first!)

Re: So angry and upset

Post by ktsl123 » Sat Dec 31, 2011 01:20 am

I know a few people that had the vertical incision on the uterus and they just had to have a c-section at 36-37 weeks. They were not allowed to go in labor. I wouldn't be too worried.

Re: So angry and upset

Post by sam10 » Fri Dec 30, 2011 10:51 am

PE leaves most of us with a lot to deal with; anger, frustration, sadness, fear, trauma, ...... There is no overreacting! Who would not be angry after such a traumatic experience? If doctors don't provide the care and attention we all deserve, it makes it just so much worse. I am so sorry you had to find out this way that you got a vertical section on top of it all :(

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