feelings of loss/really an emergency?

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Re : feelings of loss/really an emergency?

Postby akemt » Mon Dec 22, 2003 11:23 am

Anne, we love ya!

Catherine (22)
DH Britton (27)
Emma Margaret (03/02/03) 37 weeks from PIH & oligo

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Re : feelings of loss/really an emergency?

Postby annegarrett » Mon Dec 22, 2003 11:17 am

I can't really add anything to what the women have already said. Your preeclampsia sounded extremely dangerous. About 25% of the women here lost their baby so more than anything we are happy your baby was spared a NICU experience and was alive and well.

There is no way around it though--you had a traumatic experience. It is also possible that the magnesium sulfate (I am sure you were on) contributed to your general fuzziness--and certainly the cerebral edema.

The medical records likely have a detailed description of your surgery and that would go along way to helping you know what happened. I am sure you are very disappointed to have to have had a C-section but from what you describe--your doctors saved your baby and your life. And to be honest, preeclampsia just comes out of no where sometimes so they may not have known it was there more than a few weeks ago. It is very okay to be angry. Be angry at the disease--because women have this disease and have traumatic experiences and blame the doctors, or their partners, or themselves and in the end ---the real culprit--this damn disease--is not getting the funding, the focus and the full frontal attack it needs so we can cure it. We need to use that anger and disappointment to work towards a cure so none of you has to ask "Will I get it again?" "Will my daughter get it?"

(stepping off my soapbox now...)

Take care,

Anne Garrett
Executive Director
Preeclampsia Foundation

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Re : feelings of loss/really an emergency?

Postby tahoe4 » Mon Dec 22, 2003 06:59 am

I also had memory loss after my daughter's birth due to swelling around the brain. I was fortunate enough to remember the actual birth, then I have no memory from one hour after her birth until 3 days after delivery. It is a very frustrating feeling that you can't remember anything. One thing that helped me is that I requested a copy of my medical records from my OB, but you can also request them from the hospital. Then I could see everything that happened with me and there was also a report on my DD's condition. I bet you'll also find out some interesting things that your dr never told you, I know I did.

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Re : feelings of loss/really an emergency?

Postby ileana » Mon Dec 22, 2003 06:33 am

Hi Bonnie,

I'm so sorry you had to go through such a traumatic experience. Preeclampsia is indeed a very dangerous disease that can evolve from mild to severe in a matter of hours.

You don't specify at what stage you had it. If it happened after 38w, then your chances are much better of either not getting it again or getting it milder than last time.
However, your age puts you at a higher risk than other women for getting it again.

We are not doctors here, so cannot comment whether your c-section was appropriate or it would have been more appropriate to do an induction or simply wait for you to go into labor. Your blood pressures sounded quite huge however, so I tend to believe that the c-section was appropriate.

For your peace of mind, if you are still bothered about what happened, you should get your hospital records and ask for a second opinion from a high-risk doctor. This will bring you the closure you need and might make you aware of other health problems you have. You can select a doctor in your area from the:
http://www.nasshp.org/address.htm - high-risk pregnancy doctors specializing in hypertension
http://www.smfm.org./index.cfm?zone=search&nav=doctor - high-risk doctors

Keep us updated with how are you doing.

Ileana 33
Angel stillborn 24w p-e 2/17/03

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Re : feelings of loss/really an emergency?

Postby kim » Mon Dec 22, 2003 06:19 am

What you are feeling is completely normal... I'll try to answer your questions...

Brain foginess: that is due to the cerebral swelling that is caused by preeclampsia. I did not remember much of anything about my daughter's birth until the first anniversary. Not sure about the "hearing" part of it, but I could not see out of my left eye for 2 days after delivery.

Mild preeclampsia can progress VERY quickly. I was admitted at 36 weeks for mild pre-e, and was just to stay long enough to run tests. Within 8 hours, my condition gone from mild to severe to hellp syndrome. So, yes, mild preeclampsia can progress VERY quickly.

I can understand your feelings about the c-section. I did not have one, because my doctor feared that my body could not handle to trauma of surgery. But, I was terrified of having one.

I, too, suffered from really bad postpartum depression and post-traumatic stress disorder. Starting on Zoloft, then Celexa, really helped for me. And, do not feel that you have to "get over it." If you were in a car wreck, would people tell you to "get over it?" Just because we have babies, even healthy ones, after such a traumatic experience, it doesn't make the road that got them here any less awful. Yes, you do have a healthy baby, and yes, you were robbed of your birth experience. You can have both feelings!

Take care of yourself and if you need anything, email me at kim@preeclampsia.org

Kim Schwintz
Texas Chapter President

Ainsley Kathryn 11/26/02-36 Weeks Preeclampsia

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Re : feelings of loss/really an emergency?

Postby sherry fisher » Mon Dec 22, 2003 06:15 am

Hi! First of all CONGRATULATIONS on your baby girl! How exciting!
Absoulutely your doctor was right in taking your baby when they did. When your blood pressure gets that high it can cause many things to happen. Placenta abruption is when your placenta breaks away from your uterus. Many women hemorrage and many babies dont make it through that trauma. Also, when your blood pressure goes that high it constricts that umbilical cord, there is less blood flow and oxygen to the baby. Preeclampsia will worsen very quickly. There is no cure, and no one can really tell you why it happens. Its really hard to say for sure if you will get it in another pregnancy. I know you will probably be watched closer for any signs of it. Your OB should be very proactive with your next pregnancy. Some of us women on here have had it with every pregnancy and some only with one. Call us that have had it with every one...a glutton for punishment! But we stay focused on the "prize" as Erin says! You have to.

As for the confusion after and during her birth...I am SO sorry to hear that. Ask your OB if you were on Magnesium Sulfate. That is to bring your blood pressure down. It will do all of the things you described. I cant remember much of anything about my sons birth. I did not even want to see him immediately after he was born. It took me about 8 hours after his birth for me to call to the nursery to ask for him. I know now that was not me being a 'bad mommy' but the medication I was on. Ask any women here...we will ALL agree that Mag is the absolute WORST!!!!!

I need not tell you that you are a very lucky women to have a real life baby at home to stay focused on. There are many women here that have lost their babies to preeclampsia or related problems. Its horrible. I am sure Anne would be happy to send you some information on Preeclampsia. Its unfortunate that many of us women have to go 'searching' for information about this horrible disease. Our OB's should have information readily available. Most dont. They expect you to know what is going on with little questions asked.

Good Luck with your baby. A birth should be something that we can think about and experience for a life time. I am sorry you did not get that opportunity. I feel like I was left out in the cold, so to speak with the birth stories of my son. All I can say when I talk to friends about 'their' stories, is "I dont remember much". But in the end, I am thankful I had a healthy little boy!!

Sherry Fisher (28)
DH: Bill (35)
Proud Mama to:
#1) Alex 1/1/94-PE
#2) Abbie 12/17/97-PIH
#3 Will 08/03/02-PP PE
#4) EDD: 4/27/04

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feelings of loss/really an emergency?

Postby bacheak » Mon Dec 22, 2003 05:07 am

I had to have a c section on 11/14/2003 because of preeclampsia. My baby had remained breech my entire pregnancy. I'm 40 and it was my first and perhaps only baby. I didn't see her being born and didn't even hear them say it's a girl so I feel like I missed the first moments of her birth. My husband says they showed her to me but I don't remember that even. I don't know why my brain was so foggy and I couldn't hear. I had preeclampsia for about 4 weeks (although only diagnosed 2 1/2 weeks before). I know my bp was going up in the 190s systolic and 110's diastolic at home but when I read my medical records it said they were consistently in mid to high 90's diastolic (while laying down) and didn't go down. They told me that I or the baby could die. The only reason I didn't leave (they wouldn't admit me just for hospitalization or send me somewhere to get her to try tu turn) was that they said she could die. Was that really true? The medical records said the diagnosis was mild preeclampsia. They told me it could suddenly worsen. Were they correct? Could she have really been hurt if I chose to wait? I know I shouldn't have feelings of loss because she turned out healthy but I've ended up with postpartum depression. My biggest fear was a c section and that's what happened. I'm a very detail oriented person and the fact that I'm missing details of her birth is driving me insane and my husband thinks I'm crazy. He thinks I should just get over it but I'm still angry with God over the preeclampsia and angry at the doctors (who originally told me I had nothing to worry about) for forcing the c section. Are these feelings normal? Was it really an emergency? If I do have another baby what are my chances of getting preeclampsia again?

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