Hypertension medication and depression

[ileana]

I am taking a very low dose of an ACE inhibitor (Atacand) foa about a month and a half. I'm taking it because after having severe preeclampsia, I was still spilling a small amount of protein in urine (~250g/24h) and my blood pressure is borderline: above 120/80.

I lost a baby in February and since then, I have not been as depressed as I was this last month. I know it was Christmas, and everyone feeling happy with their families, but this is gone now, and I'm still fighting it. I have these awful dreams with people and kids dying or sick. Last night I had a better one... I was in a wheeling chair but I was ok, moving around happily. And then I can't actually seem to be able to achieve anything: either stick to some excercize or accomplish something. I am eating, sleeping, working, but that's about it.

I'll call my doctor, but I'd like to hear your insights or similar stories. Thanks!


Ileana 33
Angel stillborn 24w p-e 2/17/03

[josiah1112]

Hi Ileana,

I started having nightmares too. I was told that it
might have been a side effect of one of the medications
I was put on. Your nightmares are going to reflect what you
were traumatized with, which in our case were the distress our
children were in and in the fact that we were not able to pull them through. Make sure you are talking about your feelings
and concerns, Since your loss was a year ago people might
think you have moved on, but as moms we never move on, we just learn
how to cope I suppose. I have heard that at certain times
more than others the loss may seem unbearable again. I am here
for you if you want to talk. It would probably help me a lot too.
Take Care,

Gloria mom to Josiah 11/12/03- 12/4/03 born @26wks PE

[ainnj]

i was never diagnosed with pre-e, but my daughter was stillborn 11/17/02 at 39w5d (they were never able to definitevely determine why she died).

i still have nightmares. not often anymore, but i do still have them. othertimes, i get totally caught up in the tragic memories of when she died - trying to make her move, not finding her heartbeat, seeing her lifeless body on the u/s screen, FEELING the eerie heavy stillness in my belly, labor, delivery, her funeral. sometimes, i just get overwhelmed with the grief of missing my daughter and cry.

Gloria is right. people think that after so much time, we get over it. but as mother's we don't ever get over it. we just learn to live with it. my mom lost her son to SIDS when he was 3 months old. that was over 30 years ago. she still cries sometimes.

i'm sure it's possible that the medication you're taking could have something to do with your depression, but it's also quite possible that you're just sad! only a dr can make that determination.

AinNJ
Mommy to:
Tessa (s/b 11/17/02 @39w5d)
Arlen John (AJ) expected 2/20(ish)/04

[ileana]

Thanks, girls!

I know that this is something to discuss with a doctor. I was looking either for other people having similar problems or for more obscure Internet sources.

Funny enough, depression is listed as a side effect for beta-blockers ot calcium chanel blockers, but not for this type. In the medical leaflet they said that less than 0.5% of the drug tests participants had depression as a side effect... which makes me special once again...

Maybe it's just the anniversary approaching.

What I am scated of is taking yet another pill just to counteract the side effects of the antihypertensive.


Ileana 33
Angel stillborn 24w p-e 2/17/03

[kimpaulus00]

I am not taking any ACE inhibitors, rather I am taking Procardia and Atenolol, so I do not know about dreams with the ACE inhibitors. But I did have horrible, frightening dreams when I took Vicodin (sp?), or basically the Tylenol with codeine. I took one dose and am scared to take any more due to the nature of the dreams. My mom has also had problems with various medications. Mention your dreams to your doctor, fortunately my mom and I were both able to use other medications and avoid the dreams.

As for the depression, many people have told me that the grief is like ocean waves -- there are times when you will feel overwhelming grief and others when you will not. Eventually the time between the periods of overwhelming grief becomes longer, but I do not think that the grief ever completely disappears. I think that the grief shapes us just as every other event, feeling, and contact shapes us as we move through this life. We will never forget our children and they will never forget us -- that brief time we had with them has shaped all of us in ways we may never know. I hope this helps some -- for me, considering the wave of grief and how my life has been shaped helps with the pain and loss.

Thinking about you and other mothers like us....
Kim


Kim -- mother to Allison Jean, our beautiful angel who showed a spirit and strength that belied her small size

[lisac]

(Loss Mentioned)
Hi Ileana,
You are not alone. It's been a little over one year for me, and I deal with anxiety in a way I've never experienced before the loss. When I was in the hospital, the nurse told me her sister had lost a baby, and it took her a good 1 1/2 yrs to heal. We have to allow ourselves lots of time.
I try to remember that grief doesn't have a clear finish point, and it can change forms over time (such as your dreams). Nightmares are normal; when I went back to the hospital for a consultation, the nurse asked, "Have the nightmares started?" So this must be a very common reaction. I had them during the first six months, but they seem to be less now. I think we're just still going through a healing process. Be kind to yourself; think of what strength you must have to have endured the past 11/12 months. The one year anniversary date is approaching; that may bring up feelings for you. Getting up everyday & going to work is an accomplishment. So you haven't started a work-out regime...that's hard for anybody!! Knowing what you've been through for the last 11 months, I believe that you've accomplished a great deal.
Lisa

[laura]

Ileana- If it is not the meds, I wonder if there are other triggers for your depression right now(being worsened by your loss, of course)? Up here in AK, we approach Seasonal Affect Disorder as a foregone conclusion- when December hits, I fully anticipate having to fight off some level of depression.
Have you tried antidepressants before? It might be a good idea to get you over the hump, and keep you from falling too far into it, especially since your little one's birthday is right around the corner.

Ileana- Spraskium, by the way
Merry Christmas to all Orthodox Christians!

Laura-28
DH Jack-30
Allie 5-13-98 (35 weeks-pre-e)
Baby Camille 4-17-03 (36 weeks- htn and oligo)
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/c/camilleandallie/

[kimb]

I have been on an ACE inhibitor as well as massive doses of atenalol and lasix since losing William - 6 months ago today. And with all that medication I am still hanging right around 120/80 as well.

I have only had a few nightmares - but they are very clear and very disturbing.

I had thought that I was getting my emotions under control. I did much better than I expected the week William was due. But have been a mess since then. My dr had talk to me about an antidepressant but I said I was fine - it has gone downhill since then (just before Thanksgiving). Since losing William I just wanted 2003 to be over - and when midnight came on New Years I sobbed. But the depression hasn't gone away yet. I am considering talking to my dr again about an antidepressant - but like you - I just don't want yet another pill.

[sweetiesuzy]

Ileana,

I am so sorry you are having such a hard time right now. Please give yourself a break. There is no time frame for grief - or right way to grieve. It will be with you forever. Have you tried reaching out to community support? Does you hospital have a grief/loss group? Maybe there is a local SHARE group or Compassionate Friends. Those are all wonderful groups that have been in existence for a long while. There are also some other online communities that I belong to.
www.aplacetoremember.com and www.hygeia.org
I hope something here helps you in your journey. I am thinking of you and sending BIG BIG HUGS!
Suzanna

DS 3/25/95
DD 10/26/01 stillbirth
DS 12/30/02
AND ~ Peanut edd 8/6/04

[ileana]

Thank you so much! Your support means so much!

I feel better today. I had all your messages and Anne talked to me and encouraged me. Last night I gave my hubby a break from my depression, I started to read a new book and just took it easy.

Surprise, no bad dream last night and this morning we took a 1 hour brisk walk even if there are only 20 degrees outside... and I feel better.

The doctor never called back, so I could not ask him if he thinks the BP medication is the problem...

Maybe it's just me and all the other stuff piling up: winter light (you're right Laura, winter always makes me a little crazy), and the baby, and work problems...

We really are a great group! Thank you Laura for being here for us this year! And thank you to all of you that shared your feelings!


Ileana 33
Angel stillborn 24w p-e 2/17/03