Question of the Day re: family size

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Re : Question of the Day re: family size

Postby ileana » Tue May 07, 637016 7:03 pm

I used to want to have 2 kids. My ex wanted to first have a career and money to grow the kids... when that took more than 4 years, we divorced. (He now has at least a healthy kid, lucky him).

With DH, we thought about adopting, but I wanted to have the pregnancy experience (oh, what an experience I got!), so we thought all the way that we'll have a kid and adopt one.

Now I know that I'll get another eventful, fun, PreE pregnancy, but it really is hard to give in. It makes so much sense to quit (serious risk of a severely premature baby, plus transmitting this disease that I have but nobody can diagnose)... still I just can't say I'm DONE. Very difficult decision.

Can't wait to see what you gals say. Thanks Laura, these questions are so insightful!

Ileana 33
Angel stillborn 24w p-e 2/17/03

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Re : Question of the Day re: family size

Postby sonja » Tue May 07, 637016 6:51 pm

My husband has always wanted to stop at #2 - actually he would have been fine with one, but he conceded to 2. I however would love more babies. I ended up with Pre-e my 1st time around and so far at twenty weeks this time all has been well (we'll see after my OB appointment later today). I don't think that I could do it again after this though - I know too much now. I worry about leaving my little one without a mommy. I am going to stick with two and count my blessings.

Kira 4-16-02 37 1/2 weeks Pre-e
#2 EDD 6-11-04

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Question of the Day re: family size

Postby laura » Tue May 07, 637016 6:36 pm

One of the ongoing internal debates I have is balancing risking another hazardous pregnancy versus my desire to have more children.

The recurrence statistics aren't very reassuring, especially for those of us for whom Preeclampsia uncovered some nasty underlying problem to deal with. I have a sneaking suspicion since my pregnancy #2, that any pregnancy I have is going to be just as complicated as the ones that preceeded it.

Still, I don't want to admit defeat. If my dream is to have a larger family, should the fear of complications prevent me from realizing it?

Question: Has having preeclampsia changed how many children you wish to have? By how much? If you've decided to quit while you're ahead, are you ok with that?

DH Jack-31
Alicia 5-13-98 (35 weeks-severe PE)
Camille 4-17-03 (36 weeks- htn and oligo)

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