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Thanks so much for replying. I had a bmp last week but not a cbc to check platelets. My liver function was good. I am still going to the same practice but not seeing the same doctor there. I am seeing the one that diagnosed my PE after my son was born, because the hospital did not despite the high bp I had there. I am not sure if I had HELLP last time. When I had my son, my platelets and RBC and all that were way low but they said it was due to blood loss ( I had to have 12 units of blood/blood products). My liver enzymes were only slightly elevated.
After a long talk with my husband, we are going to stay with this OB but get into the Perinatalogist's a bit more often. Last time, my labs were normal until I was literally dying. My OB knows we can't really base anything off the labs this time since it will be almost useless. We are worried that any other OB would not realize that in time.
I am just really stressed about it. I am having edema again, even when I take it easy and do nothing all day. I am also having headaches. But these are also normal pregnancy symptoms. I am going to continue to check my BP at home. If my diastolic goes over 100, I am going to go to the hospital. For some reason, it is usually just my diastolic that gets high.
I had my 20 week anatomy scan today and everything looked great. With my son, the umbilical cord had an eccentric insertion. With this pregnancy, it is in the center! I am really relieved about this. The placenta looks good too but the ultrasound tech said that the poor placenta with my son was most likely caused by the PE, not the cause of it, so we will keep a good eye on it.

I'm so sorry for the loss of your son and for what you're going through now.

Your OB is right that it's a little early for PE. There is a shift that happens around 20 weeks in the way the placenta functions, and PE doesn't happen until that shift has occurred. However, just like some babies walk earlier or later than average or hit puberty earlier or later than average, some placentas make that shift a little earlier than average. There's also the possibility that your dates are off and you're a little further along that you think. So while it may be early, your symptoms should still be taken seriously.

Also, HELLP syndrome can happen without PE before 20 weeks. The URQ pain in particular concerns me. Have you had blood work to check your platelets and liver function? Even if your OB doesn't believe it's PE/HELLP, you can still ask to have the tests run "as a baseline" and get some answers that way. Is this still the same OB from before? Because if you aren't happy with your care, you are entirely within your rights to ask for a second opinion or flat out switch.

Hang in there. Subsequent pregnancies are stressful. Try not to panic, keep monitoring your symptoms, and keep pushing until you get answers that satisfy you.

Last year, I lost my son at 34 weeks due to a placental abruption caused by PE. My OB said it was so sudden that there was no way to catch it. However, that wasn't the case. I had been going to OB triage and the OB's office twice a week for a month complaining of high bp, headaches, visual disturbances, RUQ pain, and pitting edema. At triage, my b would be high but go down after laying on my left side for an hour so they would send me home. They never put me on medication, bed rest, never did a 24 hour urine. They just acted like I was crazy. The day before my abruption, triage told me not to come back in for a while because I was always there and nothing was actually wrong with me. I feel like if they had just listened to me, my son would be here to celebrate his first birthday in two weeks.
I am now 19 weeks pregnant again. My normal BP is 105/60. For the last two weeks, my BP's have been getting up to 132/96. My OB will not put me on anything until the diastolic goes over 100. For the last couple days it has been below 90, but still high for me. I have been having headaches, visual disturbances, RUQ pain, pitting edema, and low levels of protein in my urine. My OB tells me that it is too early to have PE.
I see the Perinatologist Monday for my 20 week anatomy scan and am planning to have them really check the umbilical cord and placenta. With my son, the placenta was full of clots and 100 grams smaller than it should have been. The cord was only 22cm and .8cm in diameter and was eccentrically inserted near the edge. Maybe all this contributed to the PE as I should not have got it since I had 3 living children already.
The Perinatologist was appalled by the story of my PE before and how they didn't diagnose it. But, I can only see them for consults and testing. I am going to ask them to recommend or refer me to a Perinatologist that will take over for my OB. I am just so worried about it happening again.