Mothers Day Blues

A place for those bereaved to receive and offer support
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julie f
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Re : Mothers Day Blues

Postby julie f » Fri May 11, 2007 02:25 am

On the first Mother's Day after losing Zach, I wasn't pregnant again yet and I just remember needing to be. We went to his grave and then my husband took me a few hours south and we walked around, shopped, had lunch... I wanted to be as far away from Mother's Day brunches as I could. We even had lunch in a sports bar that was airing a Laker game to try and avoid moms and babies... I don't even remember if I sent Mother's Day wishes to anyone that year.

Lisa, that is so touching what you do during your church's blessing for the mothers. I will do the same this year.

Much love to all of you, this is a hard holiday.

melissam
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Re : Mothers Day Blues

Postby melissam » Thu May 10, 2007 09:24 pm

Mothers day is still pretty hard. I think the first after a loss is the worst one. I wish that you all find some peace in the day. You will all be in my thoughts and prayers.

heather h
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Joined: Wed Jun 23, 2004 09:10 am

Re : Mothers Day Blues

Postby heather h » Wed May 09, 2007 11:16 pm

Erica and Ashley,

Your posts just break my heart... As tears are welling up in my eyes, I'm sending whatever baby dust I have to you two (and any others) that are trying to concieve after a loss. I so clearly remember those days ... and I just cant even describe the words of how badly I wanted a baby in my arms to hold, love and take care of. How it hurt to see everyone else go on with their pregnant selves or newborns or families celebrating. Doing everything I possibly could to try and concieve but it wasnt working.... It's one of the most horrible feelings. I felt like I just wanted to stay in my house untill I could give someone news that I was pregnant because I didnt even want to see how everyone elses lives were so full of happiness and mine was just ripped right away. Worrying that everyone was going to judge you as being "selfish" because you couldnt attend another babyshower or what not. There's so much that goes hand in hand with it...
Point being, come here to vent anytime. The women here are wonderful and understand what you're going through. I'm not sure where I would be if I hadnt found the PE forum and the girls here. Lean on us anytime! My prayers are with you that your journey to TTC is not much longer and that you're holding a precious little one of your own very soon.
Dont loose your faith and hope!

lots of HUGS and BABY DUST!

froggie89
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Re : Mothers Day Blues

Postby froggie89 » Wed May 09, 2007 02:16 pm

Erica,

Mother's Day is one of the hardest days for me. You always think about the handmade cards that you won't get or seeing them wish you Happy Mothers day. It's like a knife in the heart. The first Mother's day after I lost Alexander I was at church and I just cried. It was soooo painful. I think last year I was in a daze because we had lost our little girl a few weeks before. I'm just hoping for a peaceful day for all of us this year. Hugs to you!

BTW, it's good to see you back on the forums!

jana m
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Re : Mothers Day Blues

Postby jana m » Wed May 09, 2007 08:03 am

Erica,
I'm glad to see you back. I think Mother's Day is difficult for all of us who have lost a child or children. It's impossible not to think about the little faces we will never get to see when we wake up that morning.

Please take care...


belle8600
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Re : Mothers Day Blues

Postby belle8600 » Tue May 08, 2007 06:53 pm

thank you all

lisa- i have been wondering about you too and was going to emial you the other day to let you know how things were going. it is tough but i will get through it

lisainnj
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Re : Mothers Day Blues

Postby lisainnj » Tue May 08, 2007 01:51 pm

Hi Erica, I've been wondering how you were doing - haven't seen you post in a long time.

Every year my husband and children drag me to this firehouse pancake breakfast - I'm telling my husband no in advance, I want to stay home.

In church there is always a special blessing for mothers, and carnations. Ever since I lost my babies to miscarriage these last six years I have spent that time praying for mothers who have no living children and women who are trying so hard to be mothers. It hurts enough for me - there are probably a lot of women who can't stand it and just stay home that day and I don't blame them.

I keep thinking, last year at this time... Last year at this time, Francesca's heart had just started beating, and I was so pleased and trying not to be proud, and terrified, and every time I closed my eyes I saw myself holding a sword.

I hope the day is not too hard for you, and I pray you will hold your child some day...not so very far off.


belle8600
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Re : Mothers Day Blues

Postby belle8600 » Tue May 08, 2007 12:14 am

Denise,
FET- are frozen embryo transfers. I have done IVF. i did it twice and then did 3 FET and still have nothing. it is so hard. we are celbrating on Saturday with some family so i can sit and sulk an the actual mothers day

josiah1112
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Joined: Sat Dec 20, 2003 09:50 pm

Re : Mothers Day Blues

Postby josiah1112 » Tue May 08, 2007 12:13 am

So,I dislike Mother's Day.I dislike it because there are too many women out there suffering for the loss of a baby;child or loss of
their Motherhood dream.I hate it how at church they tell all of the
Mother's to stand up.This only adds insult to injury but I guess I
feel that way due to my history of it taking me a whole year to concieve my firstborn(only to lose him later:(

Guest
Registered User

Re : Mothers Day Blues

Postby Guest » Tue May 08, 2007 11:55 am

Hi Erica

I can understand your pain. I lost my 2 little guys and it is sooo true - I can't wait to hold a live baby in my arms.

I am not doing anything specific for Mother's Day. I will definitely call my mom which I do all the time anyway. I will also probably try to get out of the house and get some fresh air.

I am sorry about your failed FET's but I must ask - What are FET's?

I hope that the day is not too difficult for you and know that you can always come here to vent or whatever.

Peace,


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