trying to understand

A place for those bereaved to receive and offer support
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Re : trying to understand

Postby isabella » Fri Nov 30, 2007 06:49 pm


I am so sorry for the loss of your baby Logan. The pain of not having our babies with us is incoparable to anything else and we will always ask ourselves the same question. "Why me, why my baby" but there are no answers. I know there are no words that will ease your pain, but we are here for you.

Warm hugs

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Re : trying to understand

Postby melissam » Thu Nov 29, 2007 04:48 pm


I thought I had replied to this, but it isn't showing up.

I am so sorry sorry to hear about your sweet Logan. This really is the worst thing that a mother can go through. I am so sorry that you have to go through this too. I still cry when a new person comes on here to tell us about their loss. I cry more for the pain that I know they too are going through. The world for us is totally different. There is such an innocence that is forever lost to us.

I wish you much peace.

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Re : trying to understand

Postby adbellamy03 » Wed Nov 28, 2007 10:28 pm

It has been 5 1/2 months since I lost Megan, we were 22 1/2 weeks. It is the most intense feeling I have ever felt, have ever dealt with. I never, EVER imagined that someone could hurt this bad and not be able to do anything at all about it. I think I speak for everyone when I say that we understand what you are going thru. I started a journal to Megan which immediately helped me thru the first 3-4 months, now I am finding it is too painful to write like I did. I keep pouring out the same old questions of why, how did this happen, etc.....but I am going to try and committ myself to at least every other day, even if it is just to write I LOVE YOU MEGAN. It is so painful and so sad and I am so sorry for your loss. Amanda

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Re : trying to understand

Postby imemc3 » Wed Nov 28, 2007 09:40 pm


I am so glad you found this forum. It has helped me through so much. So many of us do understand what you are going through and the pain that is heavy on your heart. We lost our baby girl Emily at 23 weeks Sept.26,2006. Things have gotten a little easier but the pain still ways heavy on our hearts. Yes I understand about holding onto the pain. The pain is like true unconditional love in your heart. It is a part of being a Mommy. I will pray for you and pray that you will have peaceful days.


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Re : trying to understand

Postby fiona » Wed Nov 28, 2007 12:24 am

Shanon, I am so very sorry for the loss of your precious son, Logan.

Your thought about not wanting to let go of the pain, beuase that's all you have, really hit home for me. I believe that we are often encouraged to move through the grieving process too quickly - that if we're still devastated three months later, we must be depressed and need to be 'fixed'. It takes time to deal with such a huge loss and recovery is not a straight line - some days are better than others and eventually the good days outnumber the bad.

Be easy on yourself.

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Re : trying to understand

Postby jana m » Wed Nov 28, 2007 08:19 am

I'm so sorry for your loss. The women here are wonderful and we will all help you however we can. I have to agree with Anne. The hurt from having lost my girls hasn't really gone away. It has just become a part of who I am and I have learned to live my life around it because I know it will always be there. That doesn't mean that I don't feel joy or am not happy, because I am. My girls taught me so much about what is really important in life and I am so grateful that I had them, even if it was for too short of a time.

As far as trying to understand, well that's a different story. I think we would all agree that the loss of any innocent baby is totally senseless. That's what makes it so impossible to deal with.

Please take care.

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Re : trying to understand

Postby annes » Wed Nov 28, 2007 08:12 am

Shannon, I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your baby Logan (what a nice name!), as the other have said, this forum is a great, safe place to come and share your grief. I understand what you said about not wanting to let the hurt go, I felt the same way. Really, for me, the hurt has never gone away, it has become less sharp, and a little less constant. Take care of yourself.

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Re : trying to understand

Postby lucy21 » Wed Nov 28, 2007 05:22 am

Hi Shanon,
I'm so sorry you have to be here and I send you all my sympathy for the loss of your prescious Logan. I can't imagine your pain and I hope that the days eventually get a little easier for you.
Take care hun,
Lucy X

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Re : trying to understand

Postby rosemary » Tue Nov 27, 2007 06:17 pm


I am so very sorry for the loss of your little Logan. Like you, I found this site to be comforting. It too helped me to read the stories of other women. In some way, it helped me to not feel so alone and isolated in my grief. It's always so hard to see a new member here with a loss and know the pain they are in.

This site and the amazing women here got me through the worst of the worst. We are here for you and will offer any kind of support possible. My thoughts are with you.

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Re : trying to understand

Postby julie f » Tue Nov 27, 2007 06:04 pm


I am so sorry to have to welcome you here, I am so very sorry for the loss of your son Logan. I too lost my son to this disease and you are right, the devestation is overwhelming. Please know that you will find much support here, don't hesitate to let us know how we can be of help.

After losing my son, I would sit up for hours at night reading stories - crying at the losses, trying to find hope in the others. The women here are wonderful, I've never seen such strength and compassion.

Again, I am so sorry for your loss.
Thinking of you,

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