Night time is AWFUL. I used to stay up and think of Vincent.Now I stay up and worry about Sprout and think of Vincent. I do use medication to help me relax. I have been on these meds since 2003 - and stopped for my first pregnancy - this time around I just need them. I don't see it as a weakness or a crutch , just something to help my body chemistry be "normal" again without all the PTSD I started experiencing.
I hope the nights start becoming more peaceful for you soon.
As far as people who think you should have peace over losing your daughter, yes they don't understand what they are saying. You can always tell them you are dealing with your grief, with a counsellor, and are handeling things as appropriatley as one can be expected. Hopefully they will be able to support you.