Thank you very much! I definitely will not push myself, I refuse to, I just cant do it. Now my friend, she lost her daughter, same month Naomi was born. (4/2009) and well she texted me maybe 2-3 months after, saying she is pregnant. Yet grieving, and having another baby is very emotional, I hear. But she asked me, said I didnt have to, but invit4ed me to her baby shower, shes having a boy. The baby shower is March 27, (Naomi would be 11 months old). I dont think I will be going, I want to try and go for her, but she said she would understand as well. It hasnt even been a year yet and I just dont think I can go through with it. But thank you all so much.