where's my little girlie?????

A place for those bereaved to receive and offer support

where's my little girlie?????

Postby naomihope427 » Sat Mar 06, 2010 10:32 pm

I can't stop crying I want my little girlie back. My sweet Naomi she's gone. I want my little girlie back. I don't know what to do. I miss her SO much. I just want her here, here in my arms. My life is so messed up without her. I can't do anything anymore, I don't want to do anything. All I think about is her. Why was I not taken along with her? I ask God all the **** time I don't understand why was I left for this pain? My beautiful Naomi is gone. i
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Re : where's my little girlie?????

Postby wrennie » Sat Mar 06, 2010 11:29 pm

its so hard, hugs to you and your sweet Naomi.
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Re : where's my little girlie?????

Postby naomihope427 » Sat Mar 06, 2010 11:39 pm

I've been doing "ok" crying & huge burstouts and things like that for a while now but lately its been creeping up again I just miss her more than ever now, like I don't even want to be pregnant right now I feel disgusted. I feel wrong to feel that way but I do. I want my Naomi inside of me or just here with me. I feel just so empty.
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Re : where's my little girlie?????

Postby raspbeari » Sat Mar 06, 2010 11:51 pm

I am sorry, it really sucks that she's not with you. We love them so much, it is truly so heartbreaking to have had such a short time with them.
I never did get pregnant again, but I don't think it's abnormal or wrong to feel those things about being pregnant now. I can imagine feeling things like that, part of me will always want to be pregnant with Kai again, I don't think those feelings will go away.
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Re : where's my little girlie?????

Postby jsu_work » Sun Mar 07, 2010 02:21 pm

Hugs
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Re : where's my little girlie?????

Postby brianned5 » Mon Mar 08, 2010 12:14 am

Thinking of you. It's been 19 months since I lost Kylie and I still cry every day. I miss her. I look at my second daughter and I just cry. I love her dearly and wouldn't trade her for the worls, but I look at her and I want Kylie. I know our family will never be complete without her. Sending big hugs your way.
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Re : where's my little girlie?????

Postby naomihope427 » Mon Mar 08, 2010 01:17 pm

Oh I am so sorry, I feel as if ill forever be in my grief, it just doesn't seem to ever leave me. I just feel so lost not having Naomi. I don't know how to go on without her, I still feel as if im in some horrible hightmare that I just can't wake up from, a huge part of me is missing. & even going to my doctor apt today for a 2 week ultrasound thing to make sure things are ok, they are, I had a little feeling maybe hoping things weren't. I thought how could I think like that. I did see heartbeat & saw the baby at 7 weeks 3 days, I just stared off into space. My doctor later asked if I was excited, I said no im scared & confused. And I just remember him I swear like yesterday in the operating room and with Naomi, everytime I see him I just get all squeamish kind of thing. I just hurt all over. I was on my meds but I had to stop them and for depression bc of my loss and now I just feel 10 times worse. =/
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Re : where's my little girlie?????

Postby raspbeari » Mon Mar 08, 2010 07:58 pm

((hugs))
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Re : where's my little girlie?????

Postby caryn » Mon Mar 08, 2010 10:02 pm

There should be meds for you that are safe in pregnancy. And it's never good to just take a depressive off her meds because she's pregnant. You have every reason in the world to be depressed and if the meds were helping you, I'd ask the docs for some scrip that's safe in pregnancy -- I know we have a lot of posters here with similar histories of loss who were on something or other during their subsequent pregnancies.

I will be thinking of you and remembering Naomi tonight.
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Re : where's my little girlie?????

Postby darateacher » Mon Mar 08, 2010 10:27 pm

I've been on Zoloft since I lost my Aaron two years ago. It works pretty well, and I'm at work, too. Please go easy on yourself, though. Continue to grief whenever you feel it. I always do, and it feels like a release. (((HUGS!)))

ETA: I was on Zoloft when I was pg with Adam and Noah, too. They're both happy and healthy.
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