by beth11 (202 Posts), Tue Jul 20, 2010 10:01 am
I am so, so sorry for your loss, and I agree with everyone above. We also choose to not see our babies when they were born - everyone at the hospital, including our families, tried to talk us in to it, but it was best for ust at the time and I am still at peace with that decision now.
We did look at their photographs at some point once we got home. . . It might have been a month later, honestly. For me, I couldn't *not* looking, knowing they were there. My husband was not so ready. We agreed to wait until we both wanted to - then we spent some time with their memory boxes. . .
I still go back and look at their photos from time to time; my husband does not. I'll be honest, it takes some time to get used to them and find the beauty there. I wanted to "push through" :) and get to that point; he didn't/ doesn't feel the need to. It was hard for me to understand that, but each person has to do what works best for them. Don't rush yourself, and be gentle on yourself.
One suggestion - it was hard for us to not have something we felt comfortable looking at regularly and making "public", so we framed their little footprints. It's a tangible reminder of them that we're comfortable displaying in our home. Just thought you might enjoy the same. ((Hugs)) honey.