greiving again???

[frogibe]

Ok, I'm not sure how to explain this...but here it goes. I should be the happiest person right now. We have a beautiful little girl sleeping upstairs right now that I know I am so blessed to have and all I can think about is her sister and how much I miss her and how unfair it is that she is not here!!! I am angry all over again at PE! It has been almost two years since our first daughter passed and during my second pregnancy I was a wreck worrying about losing another daughter...I felt great for a few weeks after having her but now I sit here at almost 3 months PP and I just want to cry for my first born who I miss sooooo much. It is so hard to deal with this while trying to take care of my second daughter...I don't want her to feel any of my negative feelings...(just had to vent)!

[m]

I had a similar experience after my daughter was born and I even posted a similar topic: viewtopic.php?f=14&t=38985
I received lots of replies from people who felt the same way. I was so happy to have her, but at the same time it seemed to hit me all over again that I was missing all of those baby moments with my son. I had a really hard time for quite a few months. Just when I started to feel better I also went on Zoloft to treat my PMS and I started feeling much better. I was reluctant to try Zoloft because I felt that I needed to work through my emotions. But, I desperately needed it to treat my PMS and it really helped with those symptoms. As a positive side effect, I feel mostly back to my normal self the rest of the time too. My loss is always with me, and I still have some hard days but I am able to function normally and enjoy my daughter and I don't worry about negative effects on her because I am not so emotional all the time. I think that this long after your loss, if you're feeling stuck you should look into something - whether it's medication, counseling, support groups or whatever. I understand what you're going through, and I can assure you - it is possible to be happy again.

[frogibe]

Thanks. I was on Zoloft after losing my daughter. I remained on it during my second pregnancy and I recently just stopped taking it. I felt like I didn't need it any longer...now I am not so sure?....If these feelings do not get any better I will be going back on for a while. I feel comforted to know that I am not the only one to feel this way.

[holly3372@msn.com]

This made me cry. Yes,grieving again. Although I have not gone on to have another pregnancy/baby I have listened to the women that have. They all tell me your exact words. I can't imagine it wouldn't be that way sometimes. Hang in there. Love to you xo

[angieb]

We went through that too. I got through it ok without meds but I can see how that could be helpful or necessary for some people- there is a lot going on with your hormones and then caring for a new baby AND add grief to that- it's a lot!I felt like my focus through my next pregnancy was so wrapped up in making it through it with a living baby,sometimes my grief was put on the backburner, and so once my pregnancy was over, everything I had been bottling up came out.

In any case, what you are feeling is definitely normal.

[uncskristy]

I totally understand where you are coming from. I am having moments like this as well. I have to believe that it is normal. I can not imagine the grieving and Pain will ever end but as long as we do not allow the Pain to engulf our lives we should be fine.