I am so sorry for your loss and my experience was so similar in certain ways, I wrote my experience under the "Confused, emotionally, physically, mentally" if you want to read it. I just experienced this about a week ago, so it is all too fresh for me. I do find reading others stories helpful. It helps you to relate and not feel alone. I wish and Im sure others wish too, that we knew about this disease way in advance. Why is it so misunderstood? I didn't even know what it was when I filled out my first paperwork in the OB office. I think I had to ask the nurse what is was. Once I started swelling and typing in those symptoms I got pre eclampsia pop ups on google. But I didn't feel I had the other signs so it was no need to worry. Plus my doctor kept telling me that the swelling was normal, even though it was in my face and hands too. He said that shortness in breath and vision changes would be more important. I want to blame the doctors and I do to some extent when I look back, but they too are soo clueless about this disease. It is so confusing.
I had no bp or urine issues until my baby girl, Soleil, was dead inside me and at 32 weeks. She was only 2lbs 3 ozs at 32 weeks. You would think the doctors would all have higher tech 3d sonograms and use them every visit with this day in age of technology. My doctor had a low grade one and he mainly just checked her heartbeat on a heartbeat monitor and it was always ok, until my fetal movements became less and less, that was another sign I can't believe I ignored.
I go through so many phases now and it has only been a week, anger, depression, sadness, trying to forget, holding memories, it is a rollercoaster. I don't know what the future holds. I am not with the father and I only want to start trying again too, but that won't happen for some time now that me and the father are not together. I feel your pain, maybe your husband needs some time to grieve and heal too before you start trying again. Even though I won't be trying soon, I will be going back to my old gyno(he doesn't do deliveries so I had to find a new OB doc, but my old gyno is a fertility specialist and I love him, I wish I could have had him through all of this). I want him to run tests on me so I know my health. As women, we need to be more proactive in our health and I am learning this now. I hope you find peace and rest and keep on coming back to to this site, to vent to read, to write to get your feelings out, to educate yourself and others. lots of love