Re : 1st birthday
Posted: Wed Jul 21, 2004 11:10 am
It is ok that you ramble, that is why I love these forums we can talk to other women who understand what we are going through or what we went through. You can talk all you want about your little Ellie. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Bianca 9/28/02 3LBS 2 OZS PE,IUGR 33wks
Re : 1st birthday
Posted: Wed Jul 21, 2004 10:41 am
My thoughts and prayers are with you for comfort and strenght. Sending you HUGE HUGS...
Moderator Grief and Loss
Drew(13)PE 37 wks
Ky (11)PE 34 wks
~i~ Katlyne(12/9/02-04/02/03)25 wks
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http://forevernetwork.com/lifestories/l ... ope&Sort=V
Posted: Wed Jul 21, 2004 10:09 am
It's coming up to Ellie's birthday on 24 July and I find that Im feeling quite numb now we have got to the days leading up to her arrival at 27wks. I have tearful moments but I am basically numb.
I was admitted on 21 July last year having been to register with a new Dr. My bp was 185/125 and protein almost 4+ so I was sent straight into hospital. I had my birthday there, complete with steroid injections, then on 24 July I had a scan and they said they would deliver by lunchtime. It all happened so quickly, and I felt fine. It seemed so odd that things had gone so wrong. I was also on lots of drugs to keep my bp down, and was keeping a close eye on my gd. Today I keep thinking back to that day I was admitted.
Tomorrow is my birthday, I was 40 last year....somehow birthdays will never be the same again, especially the 'big' ones.
Ellie actually cried when she was born by c-section, and I was so pleased to hear her. Her Apgars were great, 9 and 10, even though she was only 1lb 4oz. Ellie had Down syndrome too, so it made her extra special. She never had a ventilator, only cpap on and off to give her a rest. We were so proud of her. It was a total shock to get a phone call on 18 Aug to say she was not well.....we lost her 2 days later due to NEC.
Im not sure where Im going with this post. I miss Ellie so much. The memories are flooding back, not that I will ever forget a moment of our time with her. I think it is the actual days that are causing this feeling right now...at this time last year...etc.
Sorry for rambling
DD Eleanor Susan (Ellie)
born at 27wks severe PE
24 July 03 - 20 August 03