Trying to look Towards Future

[rachelt]

Hello All,

My name is Rachel Taillefer, I lost my precious Michael Elijah George Graham on June 11, 2004 and gave birth on June 12, 2004 weighing 3lbs. 3oz, he was a beautiful baby and looked as if he was sleeping, that he would open his eyes any minute. The night that everything went downhill in the worst way ever, is still difficult for me to revisit. My bp started going up the week before and the doctor sent me to the hospital, and they proceeded to give me magnesium sulfate to bring my pressure down. It went down, and I was sent home 2 days later. My doctor gave me labeltol to take I proceeded to do that, and I had to visit him the next week,when I did my bloodpressure was still high, so he said to double the meds. that next night I started to feel this terrible pain, this terrible pressure, I then went to the hospital, and the baby's heartbeat stopped on the monitor. The story still kills me-especially when I revisit that night. Well, my hubby and I are having a time at recovery. Some days are good, some days are bad, but I'm having better good ones. Hubby and I wanted another baby in the hospital as this was happening, so we are planning for December. Meanwhile to keep my nerves from jumping out of my body, I have started charting my ovulation (hopefully with future baby the first healthy sperm can meet with the first healthy egg-lol). I'm currently reading Taking Charge of your Fertility and finished reading Trying Again. I would just love to hear from many of you ladies so that I can not only draw strength, and learn about how to be more of an activist for my health and the health of my future baby, but also to impart whatever knowledge and comfort I can to many ladies as well.

Thank you for Listening,

-Rachel T.

[mada]

Hi Rachel and welcome. I am so sorry for the loss of your baby boy. I know you will find great support on this board and I am glad you have found us. I do have a suggestion since you are making plans to concieve soon....It would be a good ides to have a consultation with a perinatologist (high risk OB). There is a link to finding one in the "Ask the experienced" section of the boards. Big hugs and let us know how you are doing.

Mada Harpster-moderator for pregnant again

Sam 6-29-00 36weeks P.E.
Ben 11-03-01 No P.E.

[aimeejane]

Rachel, welcome. I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your son. These boards are a wonderful resource, and I hope you find some comfort in speaking with the ladies and gentlemen on here. Remember that we're here for you on the good days and on the difficult ones. Big hugs to you.

Aimee
Georgia State Coordinator
Moderator - Pregnant Again

Ds Nicky - 3/24/00 (28 wks - eclampsia)
Ds Kalen - 7/10/03 (36 weeks - preeclampsia)

[amillhouse]

Hi, Rachel:
Nice to meet you though I am so sorry that it is here. I am very sorry for the loss of your son. I add him to my tears. I cry oceans for my son and all of our children. I also hope that you allow yourself time to heal, emotionally and physically - and you can count on us to root for you in good and challenging times.

Anika

Mommy to Isaiah Dumisani Millhouse
20 January - 17 February 2004
Born at 28 weeks due to severe pre-eclampsia
Died at 28 days old of pneumonia
610 grams at birth
950 grams at death
My Angel Boy
"My firstborn, I will never forget you, always love you, and never replace you"
[URL=http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/d/dumisani]Isaiah's Website[/URL]

[tracey]

Hi Rachel
I am so sorry to have to welcome you to this board. But I am glad that you have found this forum. It has done wonders for me since losing my first child, a daughter, in February of this year, at 25w2d gestation. It is a pain I would never wish on anyone and I am so very sorry you have to go through it.
My husband and I decided we were ready to try again at the end of June. We were pregnant in the first month of trying. We are absolutely thrilled of course, but at the same time, it is a very emotional time, as you can imagine. There will be many milestones to overcome along the way (as we near 25 weeks, and her birthdate especially), but we are very optimistic that things will work out this time. It also helps a lot to be in the care of a great doctor: I would strongly second Mada's suggestion that you seek out the care of a perinatologist, if you haven't already done so. It definitely adds to one's confidence level to know that experts in the field will be watching you (and very closely!) every step of the way. If you do decide to pursue this, somewhere on the forum is a great list of questions to ask of this (or any!) doctor at a pre-conception consult.

I am glad to hear that you are having some good days. It takes awhile to get that point. I found that once I started having some good days, I also started having more good days. I don't believe the pain will ever go away, as I don't know how it could, but I suppose we just become better at coping with it.

I wish you and your family peace, and the best of luck in the coming months as you start trying to conceive. I hope you will continue to post here and elsewhere on the forum. It would be nice to get to know you, and you will find an immense amount of support here.

Take care.



Tracey
mama to
angel Ila Elizabeth (02.06.04),
pea-in-the-pod, EDD 04.01.05

[tinalowe]

Rachel,

I am so sorry for your loss. Nothing hurts worse than the loss of a child. I know there is nothing I can say to take away your pain I woud if I could. Just know that all of us are here anytime you need us! Best of luck. I will keep you and your family in my prayeres.

Tina 23
DH Dereck 26

Emma Victoria stillborn 12-28-03 severe pre-e
ttc#2

[rachelt]

All I can say is wow! I have never been on a board this supportive. I thank you all ladies. I have a feeling that I'm not only going to learn a lot, but I have a group of women who really, really care. Thank you, and Iwhile I hate the circumstances that we are meeting under, I'm glad to be meeting you all the same!

-Rachel T.

Michael Elijah George Graham June 12, 2004 Stillborn
My Angel Baby

[ann marie]

Rachel,

I'm so sorry about the loss of your son. I cannot imagine the pain that you are feeling. I just wanted to welcome you to the forum. We're glad you found us.

Ann Marie (29)Moderator for "Ask the Experienced"
DH: Matt (32)
PIH/PE/Low Amniotic Fluid
Luke 3/17/04--37 weeks after 15 weeks of bedrest

[for faith]

Rachel ~ Welcome, I am so sorry to meet you here though. My daughter was born at 30 weeks in January, she also weighed 3lbs.,3ozs., she passed away 25 days later. I am so sorry this terrible disease has touched you like it has me. I am still having good and bad days too, this journey is so hard. Know that we are all here for you.

DH and I are just starting to try next cycle after I get back some tests from the peri. I also recommend you meeting with a peri, for me it has been great to gather all the info possible and to know I will be watched very, very carefully again.

Best of luck to you, hope you find this board as great as I have. Lots of HUGS.

Jill
mommy to:
Tyler - 4 (36 wks, PIH)
Angel baby - 1/20/03 (11 wks)
Faith Kristine - 1/5/04-1/30/04 (30 weeks due to severe PE, passed due to NEC & Sepsis(preemie complications))

trying for #2 to share our lives with since 9/02