New Cemetery Rules

A place for those bereaved to receive and offer support
Registered User
Posts: 3842
Joined: Wed Aug 25, 2004 12:57 am

Re : New Cemetery Rules

Postby mom2tori » Fri Sep 17, 2004 10:19 am

Julie, I would be so upset!! The cemetary that my son is in has a few weeks throughout the year where everything needs to be taken down but then can be put back up again. We are like you and leave balloons and trucks and toys so not being able to have anything there would make me so angry. We have had stuff stollen and last year someone who mowed the lawn broke an angel of my sons that had been there since the day he was buried. I was so mad! I called and complained but nothing was really done. I have noticed though that they are now very careful around my sons stone. The year before they hit the stone with the lawn mower and moved the stone! I don't feel you are out of line to be upset, I sure would be. Maybe you should start a petition and could get things changed. I can understand that at times things around the gravesites get in the way but to say nothing is allowed, that stinks! Maybe ask the cemetary and see what brought this change. Are the groundskeepers having a hard time mowing or are people complaining of things blowing around? Maybe they have a reason for this change. I personally don't agree with it and would be very upset. Keep us updated on what is going on. I hope our cemetary doesn't make a rule like this one. Good luck!

Alissa (23) mommy to:
Dominic 9/10/97-9/11/97
Victoria 1/8/02

for faith
Registered User
Posts: 1749
Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2004 02:15 pm

Re : New Cemetery Rules

Postby for faith » Fri Sep 17, 2004 10:14 am

HUGS Julie ~ I think it is terrible, there should have been a notice time I would think for everyone able take things down. I don't know much about cemetaries (this is my first experience), but where Faith is, they allow only fresh flowers, small wind chimes on the trees and a certain time for Christmas items. So maybe the fresh flowers is the norm in our area (I know smaller towns have a lot more extensive things they can do), even so, I think there should have been a significant time of notificiation of the change. I would definitely write your letter. HUGS.

Still go to that pumpkin patch and keep that pumpkin at home with you, that is what we are going to do. Take care,

mommy to:
Tyler - 4 (36 wks, PIH (just told by peri it was mild PE))
Angel baby - 1/20/03 (11 wks)
Faith Kristine - 1/5/04-1/30/04 (30 weeks due to severe PE, passed due to NEC & Sepsis(preemie complications))

trying for #2 to share our lives with since 9/02

User avatar
julie f
Registered User
Posts: 7993
Joined: Thu Aug 07, 2003 11:56 am

New Cemetery Rules

Postby julie f » Fri Sep 17, 2004 09:43 am

This week I went to the cemetery to visit Zach and when I was driving in there was a big sign posted that says, Due to the beautification project of the grounds, only fresh flowers will be permitted on the grounds. It goes on to explain that other items will no longer be allowed to be left for loved ones. So, this means no more balloons on his birthday, no pumpkins at Halloween, no Christmas things, etc. When I got up to his grave I was devestated. He is buried in an area that is special for babies that have passed and it's a beautiful area. Parents have various momentos and gifts that are always there - pinwheels in the flower vases, stuffed animals, etc. Well, all were gone. Including the stuffed animal my parents had secured to Zach's flower vase and the little garden stake that we would use for balloons on his Bday and other occassions.

The whole place just looked so empty, and not just the baby areas. Wind chimes and garden flags, flower pots, everything was removed all over the cemetery.

I was so upset about this, I just feel like it's one less thing I can do for my son now. Andy and I had already talked about going to the pumpkin patch next month and getting one for Zach and now I won't even be able to leave it there. I understand that the cemetery is a business and that they have a need for order but, I frankly don't understand, or want to understand this new rule. I'm working on a letter to express my frustration and sadness and I guess my question is - Am I out of line? Is this the "norm" for cemeteries?

Thanks for letting me vent ladies.

Julie (27)
Zachary James, 7/22/03-7/27/03, born at 26wks - severe pe

Miracle in progress... #2 is due February 2005!!!

Southern California Coordinator

Return to “Grief and Loss”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 7 guests