Bad day

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Bad day

Postby mom2tori » Tue Dec 07, 2004 07:43 pm

Today while I was at work, I work at the local Hallmark, a woman came in with her 3 kids shopping. I usually don't have any problems seeing mommies and their kids shopping but when this woman came to check out she was so stressed and was basically complaining about having to buy so many Christmas presents for these 3 little kids. (all under like 5 ) She says to me'you are lucky you don't have to buy presents for all these kids' I said I have a daughter to buy for and she says 'oh you are so lucky to only have 1.' All I could think of was, I should be buying little boy presents and little girl presents. I didn't tell her about my son, people just don't get it anyway, they think because I was young and still am that losing him didn't hurt as bad, it did. For a long time it took everything I had inside of me just to breathe everyday and get out of bed. I just smiled at her and said 'yeah you are probably right.' The whole incident just made today one of the days where all I could think of was what would my little boy be doing right now? Thanks for letting me unload on you guys. You are the greatest!

Alissa mommy to:
Dominic 9/10/97-9/11/97 @ 28 weeks
Victoria 1/8/02 @ 30 weeks
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Re : Bad day

Postby julie f » Tue Dec 07, 2004 08:50 pm

Alissa,

Sending you hugs... People lose sight of their blessings so often and it's so hard to hear when we'd give anything to have our little ones back...

Julie (27)
Zachary James, 7/22/03-7/27/03, born at 26wks - severe pe

Miracle in progress... #2 is due February 2005!!!

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Re : Bad day

Postby taras mom » Tue Dec 07, 2004 09:39 pm

Alissa, you're not alone! Today is Tara's 2nd birthday, and I made the stupid mistake of going to lunch at the mall. Naturally, I was surrounded by strollers and carriers full of plump little babies drinking bottles and playing with toys. Some people don't know how lucky they are! I think your little Dominic is watching over you.

Carol (39)
DH Bill (40)
Tara Mairichi
12/7-12/9, 2002
The Mightiest Little Angel
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Re : Bad day

Postby angelkat » Wed Dec 08, 2004 06:10 am

People really do not know how blessed they are to have their babies with them.



Carol.... My thoughts and prayers are with you..... Sending you HUGE HUGS...


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Re : Bad day

Postby mel h. » Wed Dec 08, 2004 06:28 am

Man, if people would just stop for a minute and think before they said things like that, the world would be a much better place. I guess the cliche saying "you don't know what you've got until it's gone" is really true for a lot of people. If something happened to one of that lady's kids, she'd regret complaining about them for the rest of her life! It's funny how she saw buying her kids Christmas presents as a burden, while those of us on this forum would give anything to have our babies with us this Christmas to buy presents for. I was in Kmart last night and I really had to restrain myself from buying this cute little flower rug for the nursery. We didn't fully decorate the nursery when I was pregnant with Ashley. There are no guarantees I'll have a girl next time, so I should hold off, I guess. I guess I'm just trying to keep the hope alive.

Melissa
Mom of Ashley Ann, born at 25 weeks on April 17 due to severe preeclampsia.
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Re : Bad day

Postby mom2tori » Wed Dec 08, 2004 08:20 am

I knew you guys would understand completely!! My husband does to a certain extent but because he isn't Dominic's dad and everything turned out great with Victoria I don't think he really understands the things I feel when it comes to dealing with other mothers and my feelings surrounding Dominic. My husband is great about giving me a shoulder to cry one whenever I need to as long as I need to, but when it comes to understanding....he has never been there so he doesn't know what it is like. I pride myself on being so good at remembering how blessed I am to have had my son for the time I did and how lucky I am to have Victoria, but this year seems harder for me emotionally then the last few years. I am so relieved to have found this forum that is filled with all of these women who are so strong and so amazing! Thank you all!

Alissa mommy to:
Dominic 9/10/97-9/11/97 @ 28 weeks
Victoria 1/8/02
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Re : Bad day

Postby heatherbbb » Fri Dec 10, 2004 02:29 am

I really "get" what all of you are saying. It's so hard when people tell us "how lucky" we are. I'm 33 weeks pregnant and so many people say things that make it seem that this new baby will make up for losing my firstborn son. How can they think that? It's as if they want to comfort themselves with that thought. Alissa, thanks for sharing your story. It just reinforces that we all have similar experiences and our feelings and reactions are not "abnormal" for our circumstances. That knowledge brings some sanity.

Heather (32)
Mother of Seth Russell, delivered 26 weeks due to PE/HELLP 9/3/03-2/13/04
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Re : Bad day

Postby grace04 » Fri Dec 10, 2004 07:24 am

I hear you all! I just hate it when people complain about their children or their pregnancy or something. Its unfortunate but people don't realize how lucky they are unless they have experienced a loss themselves.

Jaime Nolan (DH Joe)
Parents of Grace Ann
2/22/04-3/2/04 (born @ 27 weeks severe Pre E)
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Re : Bad day

Postby grace04 » Fri Dec 10, 2004 07:26 am

I hear you all! I just hate it when people complain about their children or their pregnancy or something. Its unfortunate but people don't realize how lucky they are unless they have experienced a loss themselves.

Jaime Nolan (DH Joe)
Parents of Grace Ann
2/22/04-3/2/04 (born @ 27 weeks severe Pre E)
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