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ever just want to be normal

Are you pregnant again after having preeclampsia once already in a previous pregnancy? Post your thoughts/concerns here - there are others who share your feelings. This is also the home of our Bedrest Buddies Support group.

ever just want to be normal

Postby 3preemiekidz » Fri Mar 26, 2004 09:43 pm

by 3preemiekidz (84 Posts), Fri Mar 26, 2004 09:43 pm

People I talk to get so jealous when I tell them I've had so many ultrasounds and get to hear the baby all the time. The thing is, I would trade all of it if it meant I could just have a normal pregnancy. I went in for a routine appt last week and ended up admitted to the hospital because my BP was elevated. They didn't even bother to recheck it, to paranoid with me as a patient. I was so hoping that this pregnancy would go more smoothly and I wouldn't have to worry everyone again. Anyone else feel like they are just a burden to everyone and feel cheated from having that "normal" pregnancy?

Mom to Audri 3,
Ezra 2,
Liya 1
and #4 EDD 8/1/04
born at 35, 29 and 31 weeks due to Pre-e/HELLP
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Re : ever just want to be normal

Postby sherry fisher » Sat Mar 27, 2004 04:15 am

by sherry fisher (384 Posts), Sat Mar 27, 2004 04:15 am

ABSOULUTELY, to answer your question, loudly!!!

Sherry Fisher (28)
DH: Bill (35)
Proud Mama to:
#1) Alex 1/1/94-PE
#2) Abbie 12/17/97-PIH
#3 Will 08/03/02-PP PE
#4) EDD: 4/27/04 - Allyson Mae
Pregnancy Updates, ultrasound pictures, and the countdown:
sherry fisher
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Re : ever just want to be normal

Postby lauras » Sat Mar 27, 2004 06:35 am

by lauras (91 Posts), Sat Mar 27, 2004 06:35 am

I totally understand. I have a lot of friends prego right now, too, and they are all blissfully unaware, unconcerned and uncomplicated. Me, I'm a paranoid wreck. I wish I had the confidence to start buying clothes at 6 wks like them.

Isabella caught up to full term babies so fast that even if this one is a preemie, I'll look forward to the time when they'll both be just like everyone else's kids.

Hang in there!
Wishing you the best. . .

Laura 32
DH 32
Isabella 11/25/01 - 30 wks -severe pe
Hoping for another girl 8/24/04
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Re : ever just want to be normal

Postby meljoi » Sat Mar 27, 2004 07:02 am

by meljoi (510 Posts), Sat Mar 27, 2004 07:02 am

Where my friends got jealous was in the weight loss.....
My pre-preg weight was 105....
I delivered at 160.....I was SO incredibly swollen.
No definition from my knees to my ankles.
My friends were quite jealous that I was 112lbs two weeks after
Peyton's birth. It was pure water weight.
I would have been happier to have the pregnancy and birth to have gone smoother and had to lose the baby weight the natural way......

Melissa Joi 32
DH Jeremy 43
mama to Peyton John 12/04/00
2nd babe due 12/04
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Re : ever just want to be normal

Postby sandy » Sat Mar 27, 2004 07:27 am

by sandy (1138 Posts), Sat Mar 27, 2004 07:27 am

I do feel like I wish it could be as easy as most people I've seen pregnant.

You know; BAM! you're pregnant, you look all cute getting bigger and you spend time singing to your belly and decorating the nursery and shopping for things and having an appetite to eat way too much and you get to like 39 weeks and think, "hey, I'm getting a little big, baby will be here soon" and then at like 41 weeks you're like, "okay, I'm getting a little too big", and that's your only complaint, and then at 42 weeks, your water breaks and you go to the hospital and you have the baby and then you get to hold the baby right away and the baby gets to stay in your room right next to you and then you go home as a family when you get discharged from the hospital...and then you have the pictures and video of coming home as a family and the baby breastfeeds with no problem...It's just so natural and easy for some people and I wish it were for me, too!

~Sandy/DD born via emergency C at 35 wks/1 day June '03 due to Severe PE/class III HELLP/chronic HBP/asthma
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Re : ever just want to be normal

Postby sonja » Sat Mar 27, 2004 08:41 am

by sonja (5658 Posts), Sat Mar 27, 2004 08:41 am

Yes, I wish that I did not have to worry so much, but it is so nice to have a sisterhood here that understands!!!

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Re : ever just want to be normal

Postby sweetiesuzy » Sat Mar 27, 2004 09:17 am

by sweetiesuzy (2404 Posts), Sat Mar 27, 2004 09:17 am

Feeling cheated is a very normal emotion for the types of pregnanies we have either had or are having. I know there was a really good thread at one time where lots of women wrote about their experience and their feelings. You could search it out. There was some really great points that made me feel less alone and more reassured that I was not going crazy.


DS 3/25/95
DD 10/26/01 stillbirth
DS 12/30/02
AND ~ It's a GIRL! Peanut edd 8/6/04(It will be July)
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Re : ever just want to be normal

Postby angelkat » Sat Mar 27, 2004 12:08 am

by angelkat (3423 Posts), Sat Mar 27, 2004 12:08 am

I would LOVE to have a normal preg (WHAT'S THAT!!) To top it off we have 3 ladies that are preg at church and I have to hear each week how wonderful they feel and how wonderful being preg is. Heck, I'm scared out of my mind. In no way do I want to have to sit in the NICU for 12-18 hours per day for 3 months and not be able to bring a baby home. I haven't brought anything for this baby and in a way that is so sad but in my mind if I buy things I will only have to put them away in the closet.


Mommy to
Ky (11)
~i~ Katlyne(12/9/02-04/02/03) and little bud (Due 09/11/04)
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Re : ever just want to be normal

Postby suzanne » Sat Mar 27, 2004 07:49 pm

by suzanne (114 Posts), Sat Mar 27, 2004 07:49 pm

I CERTAINLY know how you feel, Rebecca. It's so hard for someone who hasn't been through a tough pregnancy and/or birth to understand. One way I try to look at it sometimes is that hopefully I can educate others by telling my story. With my first pregnancy, I knew NO-ONE really that had had a troubled pregnancy. At work, everyone seemed to work right until their due date, and feel great. I felt like that was what I supposed to do, even when I was swelling up extremely and feeling worse and worse. When I finally just couldn't work anymore (and a day later my dr. told me to stop working if I hadn't), so many people acted like I was some kind of wimp---even my mother, who had breezed through her pregnancies. I wish so much someone had been there to tell me I was doing the right thing, and that others had had a not-perfect pregnancy.

But I can't say I don't wish sometimes I was one of those people who had no reason to know that pregnancy is not always easy!!

Suzanne (38) and DH Tony (42) + William (9, severe PE, born at 32 weeks) and Freddy (6, fairly typical pregnancy) and Baby Girl(due approx. 8/29/04!)
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Re : ever just want to be normal

Postby laura » Sat Mar 27, 2004 07:54 pm

by laura (5139 Posts), Sat Mar 27, 2004 07:54 pm

Oh, Suzanne, I totally can relate. I wish someone had told me that it was ok to take it easy with my first one. I already felt like a wimp because the hyperemesis just put me out of commission, and when I got put on bedrest... ooooh the guilt.

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Mom to Alicia (severe PE) 5/98 and Camille (htn, oligo) 4/03
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