Well, after thinking (and in a way fearing) that I would need Clomid and an IUI to become pregnant, I discovered that I was pregnant again. I am glad I took that pregnancy test before starting the Provera (if the test was negative, I was filling the Provera that day). Right now, based on LMP, I am only 6.5 weeks, but considering that the pregnancy test was not positive till day 35, I figure that I am closer to 5.5 weeks.
Anyway, now that I am pregnant again, I keep feeling like the other shoe is going to drop. So, I worry with every twinge or pain (most of which have been gas -- lots of gas -- anyone else have that problem?), I am constantly afraid that this pregnancy will end in miscarriage (although I am on progesterone -- level was 8.7 better than the 7.4 with Allison) or that I will lose this child as well. How did anyone else deal with those fears or how are you dealing with these fears? Or am I just plain crazy (you would not be the first to say so :-) )?
I have great doctors (cardiologist who is wonderful) and a peri (who seemed VERY positive at the pre-pregnancy consultation). Unfortunately, the insurance is being picky about where I see the peri, but her assistant (who is also a wonderful person) is going to see what she can do and told me not to worry about that.
Even with the great doctors and the knowledge obtained since losing Allison (about pre-E and the clotting issues that I have), I am still living in constant fear and apprehension. I keep feeling like I have to prepare myself for the worst all of the time and I would like to enjoy this pregnancy, but I just feel like I can't. Any advice, help, encouragement, knowledge from those "been there, done that" would be GREATLY appreciated.