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Do you feel jaded?

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Do you feel jaded?

Postby mamakimberly » Fri May 07, 2004 04:41 pm

by mamakimberly (70 Posts), Fri May 07, 2004 04:41 pm

Does your past experience with PIH taint your current views of pg?

I find that when people ask, "How are you feeling?" "Is this pg healthy?" I can only say...

"Today, I feel great. I am praying about tomorrow."

I *know* how fleeting pregnancy health can be. I *know* that you can feel fine one day and be deathly ill the next.

The fact that this pg has been easy as pie and has had NO issues is *great* but it doesn't mean I'm in the clear. And I guess I'm just not willing to let my guard down, until the baby is here and in my arms... you know?

I don't think some people understand my reservations.

Kimberly

Kimberly
Mama to Libby, 12/13/02
pre-e/HELLP/induction/c-section
Scheduled c/s planned 7/30/04 for baby Katie, so far a healthy pg!
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Re : Do you feel jaded?

Postby akemt » Fri May 07, 2004 05:00 pm

by akemt (4961 Posts), Fri May 07, 2004 05:00 pm

I understand. I got alot of flack from my mother for watching as closely as I did...to the point that I stopped telling her everything untill after I was diagnosed. Then she took it more seriously. She didn't understand that I could actually see the trend and know it was coming. Now she is always telling me to sit down and relax when I'm trying to get things done around the house...LOL

But, even after diagnosis that doesn't exactly go away. Now my irritation is that everyone asks me how I'm feeling and honesly how I feel has very little to do with how healthy my pregnancy is. I also don't feel the excitement that I did when I was first pregnant with Emma. I don't know how much of that is second pregnancy stuff, PIH related, or because I'm treating this pregnancy as more of a medical issue than the miracle it really is? Either way, I'll be happy to have a little baby (or big one) in my arms and not be pg anymore. Perhaps that is when we'll celebrate!



Catherine (23), Moderator (pregnant again)
DH Britton (27)
Emma Margaret (03/02/03) 37 weeks from PIH & oligo
Baby #2 due August 11, 2004 PIH
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Re : Do you feel jaded?

Postby angelkat » Fri May 07, 2004 05:07 pm

by angelkat (3423 Posts), Fri May 07, 2004 05:07 pm

I'm taking it one day at a time. I have even refused to travel (to DH homestate 7 hours away) for a graduation, wedding etc as I did not want to be that far away "just in case" at times, I think my DH thinks I'm crazy for saying I'm not going!...

It's sad but true... Maybe when I get closer to 35 weeks I will get excitied about it....

Hugs
~T
Moderator Grief and Loss
Mommy to
Drew(13)
Ky (11)
~i~ Katlyne(12/9/02-04/02/03) & Casey (EDD 09/10 or 09/11-Sure he will be here in Aug)
Katlyne's Tribute Site
http://forevernetwork.com/lifestories/lifestory.cfm?Archive_ID=10971&Directory=/Archives/MountHope&Sort=V
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Re : Do you feel jaded?

Postby mamakimberly » Fri May 07, 2004 05:09 pm

by mamakimberly (70 Posts), Fri May 07, 2004 05:09 pm

BINGO!

quote:
pregnancy as more of a medical issue than the miracle it really is


That's it!! Right there.

To me, pregnancy IS a medical issue. I didn't want it to be, but it is!! I see friends who homebirth and have these awesome totally natural labors and I'm like "WOW, that's pregnancy and birth... so what the heck is it that I'm doing here??" I think I'm having a medical condition for 9 months, and they're having a beautiful natural miraculous thing....


Kimberly
Mama to Libby, 12/13/02
pre-e/HELLP/induction/c-section
Scheduled c/s planned 7/30/04 for baby Katie, so far a healthy pg!
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Re : Do you feel jaded?

Postby catherine » Fri May 07, 2004 05:43 pm

by catherine (2832 Posts), Fri May 07, 2004 05:43 pm

Kimberley, I just have to say....... we've learned by bitter experience that it's not about the process, it's about the end result, which should be walking out that hospital door with a healthy full term baby in your arms. What you need to do to achieve that goal... you'll do, and do it gladly.

For some folks, they are lucky to never end up with this perspective, the journey is as exciting and as pleasant as its end. Still, do we have the edge in understanding how precious even a single day with our child is?... I think so.

Catherine
Mom to Finn, Lucy (preeclampsia and HELLP) and Chloe.
Moderator HELLP Syndrome Survivors
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Re : Do you feel jaded?

Postby suzanne » Fri May 07, 2004 07:19 pm

by suzanne (114 Posts), Fri May 07, 2004 07:19 pm

I know just what you are saying, Kimberly! My second pregnancy was quite close to normal, but I NEVER relaxed and felt sure it would stay that way. This one is having many ups and downs, and in a very strange way it's almost more what I expected. Catherine, you really are right on in saying that for some of us, pregnancy really is more of a medical issue than a miracle! To me, the babies and children are the miracle! Not that I don't think pregancy is too, but I think you are so right that it's not the process, it's the result! But friends and family often do view this as a negative view. Since there was such a long time between pregnancies for me, a lot of my friends now didn't ever know me when I was pregnant previously. I thought I had told them enough so they would understand, but they really don't---one friend was quite upset when I cut short a get-together "just because I had a headache and swollen hands". She told me later "I just don't think it's normal to worry that much!" I was so upset at first, but realized later than I just don't think it's totally possible to understand unless you have experienced a tough pregancy!

Suzanne (38) and DH Tony (42) + William (9, severe PE, born at 32 weeks) and Freddy (6, fairly typical pregnancy) and Baby Girl(due approx. 8/29/04!)
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Re : Do you feel jaded?

Postby angelkat » Fri May 07, 2004 08:34 pm

by angelkat (3423 Posts), Fri May 07, 2004 08:34 pm

Unless they have been there they do not understand... Even in the medical Profession if you haven't lived thru it you really don't know! (Seen more than my fair share of comments and such)

I would love to have a "Normal" preg one like you see your neighbor having. Enjoying the sunshine, be able to shop until you drop, heck even going to work>(ok, I went overboard on that one LOL) but you know what I mean...

Hang in there ladies... As long as we have eachother were in good company!...



Hugs
~T
Moderator Grief and Loss
Mommy to
Drew(13)
Ky (11)
~i~ Katlyne(12/9/02-04/02/03) & Casey (EDD 09/10 or 09/11-Sure he will be here in Aug)
Katlyne's Tribute Site
http://forevernetwork.com/lifestories/lifestory.cfm?Archive_ID=10971&Directory=/Archives/MountHope&Sort=V
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Re : Do you feel jaded?

Postby sweetiesuzy » Sat May 08, 2004 07:09 am

by sweetiesuzy (2404 Posts), Sat May 08, 2004 07:09 am

I can totally relate. My mother wants me to travel to Cape Cod the first part of July for vacation. Sure, yeah, OK MOTHER! I am not going anywhere. Even though I have been in the clear thus far I know how quickly the evilness can creep up on me. 31 weeks with Sam and they almost delivered me.

I wish people would get it.

Hugs,
Suz

DS 3/25/95
DD 10/26/01 stillbirth
DS 12/30/02
AND ~ It's a GIRL! Laura Elise edd 8/6/04
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Re : Do you feel jaded?

Postby angelkat » Sat May 08, 2004 07:57 am

by angelkat (3423 Posts), Sat May 08, 2004 07:57 am

Suz...
Oh how I know what you mean... DH wants me to travel to Indiana to his parents for Memorial Day weekend. NOT.... I'm staying at home where I am only 15 mins away from my doctors!



Hugs
~T
Moderator Grief and Loss
Mommy to
Drew(13)
Ky (11)
~i~ Katlyne(12/9/02-04/02/03) & Casey (EDD 09/10 or 09/11-Sure he will be here in Aug)
Katlyne's Tribute Site
http://forevernetwork.com/lifestories/lifestory.cfm?Archive_ID=10971&Directory=/Archives/MountHope&Sort=V
angelkat
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Re : Do you feel jaded?

Postby catherine » Sat May 08, 2004 08:29 am

by catherine (2832 Posts), Sat May 08, 2004 08:29 am

Guys you are so entitled...... we lied like dogs to close friends and family to try and hide why, after promising faithfully to do it, we wouldn't go home to Ireland last May for DH's best friend's wedding and to visit the in-laws so that they could meet Lucy. Fortunately it was DH's idea that we not budge from being beside the hospital... just in case........

Catherine
Mom to Finn, Lucy (preeclampsia and HELLP) and Chloe.
Moderator HELLP Syndrome Survivors
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