If you have/had PE with baby #2

Are you pregnant again after having preeclampsia once already in a previous pregnancy? Post your thoughts/concerns here - there are others who share your feelings. This is also the home of our Bedrest Buddies Support group.
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theartsymom
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Re : If you have/had PE with baby #2

Postby theartsymom » Sun Jun 14, 2009 10:32 am

DD was a 31weeker and spent 57 days in the NICU- and we knew from the beginning it could turn out that way again. It was hard to schedule all the dr's appointments around normal life. We put DD in school so that I could get to the Drs appointments. I set up a blog for family and friends to keep up on my status, that way I did not have to talk about it all the time. We planned menus ahead of time and stocked the freezer so that I was not cooking every night. Anything that took stress off me, we did.
Eventually I was on bed rest at home, and could not drive. That lasted three weeks until I was put on hospital bedrest. DH and I had planned what we wanted for DD and that helped too. We wanted her to have as normal of a life as possible, especially if we were going to have another NICU baby. We had family members come and stay at our house so DD could be in her room, go to school and play toys.
She came to visit me every day in the hosital and we did normal things like, play games and watch her shows. I got dressed in my own clothes and fixed my hair/makeup somewhat- everyday ,to have some sense of normal for her.
Eventually DH took off work and took care of DD- they also spent the night at the hospital with me, and that was good for everyone. Once DS was born- our family came back to town and DD stayed at home.
hth!

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theartsymom
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Re : If you have/had PE with baby #2

Postby theartsymom » Sun Jun 14, 2009 09:47 am

we talked a lot about it before hand, and made sure that "my" ob was on board with it. It was important to me to have him on board with another baby. he was very encouraging of another baby. we also hired a perinatal dr. It took some work to find one we liked and it was worth it. The most stressful part was that the peri died suddenly, right at my 29 week mark. That was not fun.
We hired another dr and he was ok- but not as good as the former one.
We did not tell anyone that we were TTC- because we did not want to hear it from them- it was not their decision to make. Once we were PG, we did tell them right away.

BBL.

lilillini
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Re : If you have/had PE with baby #2

Postby lilillini » Thu Jun 11, 2009 06:46 pm

Going through it a second time is a rollercoaster emotionally. I think most of us are optimistic at first and at the same time are convinced we're going to get it again. Once the morning sickness set in and the pregnancy "felt" the same as with DS, I was scared it was going to take the same path. And then when I had an elevated AFP just like I did with DS, I was absolutely convinced that I was getting PE again (because it is thought that "false positives" on AFPs when not explained by incorrect dates or other errors could indicate complications further along).

I know I drove my OB crazy when my BP started going up in the 3rd trimester. But I knew what was going to happen, and really, so did she. My PE took a different course this time (progressed more slowly, had different symptoms, and low protein), but it ended in severe PE with a preemie. At least this time I knew more and pushed for close monitoring, and was actually relieved to be put on hospital bedrest. With the labile high BPs I had, I was terrified that I would have a seizure at home.

I am thrilled with our little girl, and she definitely completes our family. It was a rough road to get here, but definitely worth it, and now that our family is complete, I couldn't be happier to have gotten my tubes tied! :)

dbronson
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Re : If you have/had PE with baby #2

Postby dbronson » Thu Jun 11, 2009 06:35 pm

I was scared spitless the whole pregnancy last time, lots of time just crying, the anxiety was so bad. I drove everyone here crazy with questions (still am). But really, once you hold the baby, its all good.

That said, I had my heart set on four kids but my doctor suggested that three is good. My husband is also scared to have me get sick again. So I will stay at three. I know I am very lucky.

mlcoltrain
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Re : If you have/had PE with baby #2

Postby mlcoltrain » Thu Jun 11, 2009 05:57 pm

It was a very emotional decision the 2nd time, we almost decided against another child. We had tests done and had preconception counseling before making a final decision. We didn't tell anyone we were even considering because we didn't want the added pressure from outside family. My DH and I talked a lot, his biggest fear was the stress I'd be under and the fact that my first case was so severe I could have died. He didn't want to risk my life for another baby. Mine was going through it again and losing the baby, I wasn't sure I could handle that emotionally. We talked a lot and after talking to our docs and getting reassurance and knowing I'd be under better care we decided to TTC. We didn't even tell family until after I was already pregnant and I'm waiting until I am 30wks to tell the rest of our friends. Our biggest milestone was getting to and past 27wks which was when my DD was born. I am now in my 29th week and so far everything has been great, we are hopefully optimistic. It was a hard decision but we felt that our family wasn't quite complete. I'm glad we made the decision and even if my DS is born tomorrow I will not regret the decision to have another baby.

lilliputianmama
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Re : If you have/had PE with baby #2

Postby lilliputianmama » Thu Jun 11, 2009 02:48 pm

I'm on pregnancy #3 after two bouts of preeclampsia. This one is totally unexpected. Sometimes you just have to jump in and go. My family was very freaked out with baby #2 and everyone is at peace with this baby. So, who really knows...

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jayme
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Re : If you have/had PE with baby #2

Postby jayme » Thu Jun 11, 2009 02:33 pm

It's scary being pregnant again after pre-e... and I know my friends and family worry. I've found the more positive and upbeat and excited I am when talking to them, the less they stress. Every milestone I pass makes it easier as well.

jennigator3
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Re : If you have/had PE with baby #2

Postby jennigator3 » Thu Jun 11, 2009 12:48 am

OMG Milesymommy, your last sentence brought me to tears. Of course it would be worth it, so very worth it!

milesymommy
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Re : If you have/had PE with baby #2

Postby milesymommy » Thu Jun 11, 2009 12:46 am

I'm 26 weeks now. I had PE/HELLP with my first pregnancy - induced at 36 weeks due to HELLP, but my son was born healthy nonetheless. So my first pregnancy story is not that scary. At the time I was naive and knew little about PE (and never heard of HELLP until after I was induced), and my OB wasn't overly concerned about me until my blood tests showed I had elevated liver enzymes, and then they got worried. I hated being induced and on mag and not being able to hold baby much the first few days, but at least he was healthy. With that said, I know what PE can do now, and have worried since I found out I was pregnant. Every woman is different, every pregnancy is different. My BP started creeping up at 20 weeks last time, lots of swelling. I'm at 26 weeks, still have great BP, minor swelling. I'm now to the point of being cautiously optimistic that maybe I won't get it this time. Some women are able to not think about it and not worry about it until the symptoms appear... but I have been worried the entire time. I'm being seen as high risk, so that helps that I know I'm getting the best care possible. I know more now, and am watching for symptoms.
Mostly, though, our innocence is gone, and its not the same. I'm mentally braced for little one to come early. When people ask my due date, its hard to say "Sept 11" because part of me knows/assumes baby will be here well before then. I look forward to every doctor appt to verify that yes, we're healthy. But here is a place to vent and get support.. its helped me with all my worries.
Good luck with your decision. It's between you and your DH. Is a few months of pain (and potential loss) worth the potential of another baby in your lives? Going down the slide together at the playground, painting fishies, blowing bubbles... Our answer was yes, it's worth it.

jennigator3
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If you have/had PE with baby #2

Postby jennigator3 » Thu Jun 11, 2009 12:24 am

what was it like for you emotionally the second time? How did your friends and family react? I am about to start TTC soon after having my son at 33 weeks last February. It was not an uneventful NICU experience, he got NEC and had several surgeries, it was hard on everyone.

As optimistic as I feel about having another baby, I don't know how I'll handle being in the hospital again or having another baby in the NICU. I want my family and friends to be happy for me, not concerned about my health. How were things for you the second time around?


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