Try this again...

Are you worried about your partners pregnancy? Has your partner already had preeclampsia? Do you have advice for other dads who could be going through similar experiences as yourself? Post here!

Try this again...

Postby eddie_k » Tue Apr 12, 2005 09:32 am

Hello everyone,

For those who don't remember me and my wife, we lost our daughter Colleen Marie to PE and related issues: ([url]http://www.preeclampsia.org/forum/viewtopic.php?t=5024[/url])
We finally got pregnant again after 6 months with Colmid, so the excitement and WORRYING have begun. It has been funny with her OB, how they have blown off all that has happened before and treat her like nothing will ever go wrong again and we shouldn't worry. So we have decided to see the Maternal and Fetal Medicine Group down in Philly. We go there is an few weeks for our first dating scan (at ~6 weeks). They like to tell us that we are their least interesting case. I like to hear that. But they are much better and don't treat us like "crazy people with the dead baby" as we like to say.

So we just found out from my mother in law that my wife's sister my have a blood clotting disorder (which one is not certain yet). So this has raised some eyebrows and worries with me and my wife. It could be related to liver damage (due to medications over the years) or genetics but no way to be sure. I have read that there is a link between certain clotting disorders and PE. Does anyone have nay info on this or opinion? We both think my wife should get tested once we figure out what her sister has. IS there anything that I should be aware of? We try to find as much information as we can but I hope someone might have some that we haven’t found.

So once again thanks for listening to my rant and if you have some time send some prayers our way (worrying gets the BP up and she doesn't need that). Thanks again for all the support through our lose and I will check back with anything new.

Eddie K.
eddie_k
Registered User
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Tue Aug 24, 2004 09:05 am

Re : Try this again...

Postby kdreher » Tue Apr 12, 2005 09:55 am

HI Eddie,
Well I don't think I ever met you back in Aug, but wanted to say hello and I am so sorry for your loss ~ I know how you and your wife feel. Congratulations as well on the pregnancy, as I am sure you will feel as though every day is a stressful day ~ but try to NOT stress!! I know the PA area pretty well as my father grew up in the Northeast and I was treated for eclampsia and HELLP at a hospital in that area as well...but I can't tell you here, they really don't want us naming hospitals on the forum for legal issues :-) It sounds as though you are both happy with your new docs.

Did the group decide to run any blood tests to see if your wife has any underlying clotting disorders? My peri did a total blood work up on me to see if I had any ~ and it was negative ~ I wanna say it was a thrombosis type of work up. Well, it might be worth it to ask.

I also wanted to mention that we are having our first ever PF walk-a-thon on Saturday, May 7 at Mondauck Common Park in Ft Washington and would love to have you both join us, if you are up to it, you can email me at the address below and I'll fill you in. I live in CT, but am working with a PA member this year....as my family and friends are mainly in PA!

Keep us posted with the pregnancy....

Kris (35) & Tom (35)
Connecticut State Coordinator

My Angel - Tyler 3/9/95 to 3/23/95 (15 oz, 26 wks severe pe/HELLP)
Tubal Ligation 2/2000
Tubal Reversal 10/2004
Miscarriage 1/05



tkstevens@sbcglobal.net
User avatar
kdreher
Registered User
 
Posts: 2482
Joined: Mon Oct 20, 2003 11:38 am
Location: Rhode Island

Re : Try this again...

Postby annes » Tue Apr 12, 2005 10:03 am

I don't know much about the blood disorders, although I am sure some of the ladies here will chime in, just wanted to say Congratulations on your good news. There are a lot of success stories floating around this forum of people who have lost a child and gone on to have another. Take care and keep us posted.

Anne
DH Richard
DS Parker 7/6/03(severe pe)33wks
Miscarriage(14 wks, D&C) 12/04
annes
Forum Moderator
 
Posts: 2527
Joined: Wed Jan 14, 2004 11:53 am

Re : Try this again...

Postby gordon k » Tue Apr 12, 2005 09:34 pm

Eddie,

So sorry to hear about the loss of your daughter.

My wife didn't have anyone in her family with clotting disorders, but if I were you, I'd bring it up to her perinatologist, and as Kris said, ask him or her to run blood tests on underlying clotting disorders (if you can give them more detail on your wife's sister as information becomes available, that will help). Hopefully, they'll run every test possible to give you peace of mind, and work with you to prevent anything going wrong.

Best of luck with this pregnancy. Having a great perinatologist will help with peace of mind, and hopefully with a successful pregnancy.

Prayers,
Gordon

Gordon(38),
DW, Norlisa (35)
essential hypertension diagnosed before pregnancy, successfully treated with atenolol, NO preeclampsia antepartum. (post-partum preeclampsia)
Joseph/Josephine Our Angel in Heaven (9/16/02)
Twins Mary Frances and Samuel (a.k.a. Frankie and Sammy) 38 2/7 weeks, 5/26/03
gordon k
Registered User
 
Posts: 113
Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 01:18 pm

Re : Try this again...

Postby fiona » Tue Apr 12, 2005 10:31 pm

Eddie,

I completely understand how you feel - 'the freak' reference hit home, as did the fear of entering into another pregnancy.
I didn't have any of the tests you refer to until this, my third pregnancy. I was part of a research study into pe and they tested me for everything: lupus, anticoagulant somthing or other, prothrombin mutation, protein s... I honestly can't remember them all (it was about 20 vials of blood!) . But I would expect that if you inform them of your SIL's condition, they should be quick to order tests.

I also did a 24hr urine at around 12 weeks to get a baseline figure as well as liver and kidney function blood tests. I took baby aspirin daily in both this and my second pregnancy to help blood flow.

I wish you both well and hope that you have a dull and boring 9 months ahead of you.


Fiona
dh Tom
ds Nate 12/8/97 - 14/8/97 26 weeks severe pre-e IUGR 1lb
ds Jay 4/11/98 30 weeks pre-e 3lbs 11 oz
no 3 due 15/6/05
fiona
Forum Moderator
 
Posts: 5767
Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2004 08:33 pm

Re : Try this again...

Postby eddie_k » Thu Apr 14, 2005 01:28 pm

Thanks everyone for the support again. We are making up our lists of questions for the doctors as we speak. As many of you might know this is the wierdest (sp?) set of feelings we have ever had. One second we are excited about being pregnant then the next we are scared to the max. My wife had pretty severe PE with our daughter. The doctors worry if it gets any worse that there might be some serious issues. At least this time we all will be looking out for it. Of course that means every little pain will start the worrying. I think we can get the tests called for. If there is an issue and it explains what happened to my daughter and my wife then I will be somewhat happy to have some closure. If they come up negative, that will be one less thing to worry about. I will keep you guys informed and thanks for listening.

Eddie
eddie_k
Registered User
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Tue Aug 24, 2004 09:05 am

Re : Try this again...

Postby kdreher » Fri Apr 15, 2005 04:55 am

Eddie,
Sounds like you have a plan...I can't say I know how you feel right now - but I am sure once dh and I get that +++ for pregnancy I will feel the same way ~ as many women here do. My dh was not around when I had eclampsia/HELLP in 1995 so he enters in w/o really "knowing" but I know that he feels better having met with the peri and OB. Good luck.

Kris (35) & Tom (35)
Connecticut State Coordinator

My Angel - Tyler 3/9/95 to 3/23/95 (15 oz, 26 wks severe pe/HELLP)
Tubal Ligation 2/2000
Tubal Reversal 10/2004
Miscarriage 1/05



tkstevens@sbcglobal.net
User avatar
kdreher
Registered User
 
Posts: 2482
Joined: Mon Oct 20, 2003 11:38 am
Location: Rhode Island

Re : Try this again...

Postby eddie_k » Wed Aug 17, 2005 10:53 am

I just wanted to give an update for everyone; my wife is in week 23 and is doing fine. We have been to the doctors about once a month and have had numerous ultrasounds (I love the pictures). If anyone has the chance to do a 3D ultrasound it is amazing what you can see. I got to see our daughter's face and I must say she is beautiful but I digress. We thought she was having some issues with her vision and pain and things like that but it seems that it was all just normal pregnancy stuff. The doctor actually had blood work drawn (liver and kidney screens, and everything else) just to make sure. She is all normal. We are getting down to crunch time and I and my wife are on heightened alert. I goal is to get through each week. My ultimate goal is to be able to take my wife and daughter home with me. We prayer to get through each week and get to 32 weeks is our short term goal. I will to keep everyone up to date. Does anyone have any suggestions on things to help her through this? She worries about everything (which I can understand) and I would like to keep her as calm as possible. Thanks in advance.
eddie_k
Registered User
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Tue Aug 24, 2004 09:05 am

Re : Try this again...

Postby melissam » Wed Aug 17, 2005 01:19 pm

Thanks for the update. I am glad to hear that everything seems to be going much better this time around. I pray they will continue to do so. Congrats on a girl. They are so much fun.
melissam
Registered User
 
Posts: 3074
Joined: Thu Jan 13, 2005 10:48 am

Re : Try this again...

Postby anathor21 » Wed Aug 17, 2005 01:24 pm

Sure wish I had the magic solution to keeping my wife from worring to share... one thing we have done is keep her from reading the stories here. I do all the research and share the interesting tidbits with her - I like to say that her job is to grow our son, mine is to worry. So far it seems to work most of the time - but then again we have been far more fortunate than many others.

Our home monitoring routines have also helped a bit I think. We bought a BP monitor that she can operate herself (previously I checked it with a more traditional cuff). Keeping the log has helped us both to recognize the 'normal' dips and peaks. At least we have a sense that we'll recognize a spike if it does happen.

Doing kick counts or other monitoring of movement also seems to reassure her. We have not been very good at actually writing down how long it takes to get to 10 movements, but the relaxing and feeling movements for a while seems to generally help.

I am sure that my DW feeds off my anxiety levels so I have done everything I can to keep my irrational fears to myself and only share the real ones (i.e. things that she is feeling anyway most likely) and we've had several long chats about the fears - it seems to help both of us to speak a tiny bit about the unspeakable.

Glad that things are going well for you so far. Good luck in the days/weeks/months ahead. Let me know if you have any suggestions or find anything that seems to work for reducing her worry - I may be able to use it here too.
anathor21
Registered User
 
Posts: 519
Joined: Thu Jul 14, 2005 07:49 am

Next

Return to Dads

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests