Am I insane? Seriously am I?

Are you considering having another child after preeclampsia? Trying again after preeclampsia can be an emotional challenge. You can find support with others who share your concerns here.
seastar
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Re: Am I insane? Seriously am I?

Postby seastar » Sat Nov 06, 2010 08:11 am

I can understand your hesitancy about having to move away during the pregnancy, and I can relate. My husband's in the military and between his insane work schedule and deployments, we figured I'd have to take our daughter and move home with family if I was to conceive again. We actually ended up planning to get pregnant this time when we knew he'd be deploying for a year - that way the separation that was going to happen anyway means it's less of a big deal for my daughter and me to have moved home till the baby's born. In my opinion, the pluses to planning for a separation/move are having a better sense of control over possible outcomes and therefore one less layer of worry, being somewhere with extra hands and a great support network when the baby arrives, and for me knowing that if I end up being hospitalized or spending days on end at the NICU again, my toddler's day to day routine will hardly change at all because she's well settled into her new environment already. The big downside is your husband missing the pregnancy and delivery, and you possibly having to face an emergency without him, which would be very difficult (for us this was slightly easier to accept because my husband missed the first delivery even when he was in the area, so knowing how unpredictable Army life can be made us better able to accept that he'll miss this one, too!). The really big upside, though, is when the new baby arrives making all the sacrifice and upheaval worthwhile : )

Hopefully you and your family can come to a decision that makes you happy and allows you to get the medical care you would need if you decide to conceive again! Good luck with a difficult decision.
mom to Auden, born at 27 weeks due to severe PE
expecting another daughter March 2011!

hhbeachgurl
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Re : Am I insane? Seriously am I?

Postby hhbeachgurl » Fri Oct 15, 2010 07:04 pm

Thanks yall. It is just so much to think about. Even trying to think about thed planning on when weould be the best time to start trying so that leaving the island for several months doesn't interfer with anything. Gahh. I could get pretty good basic medical care here. I know all the docs very well since DH works there, and they have ultrasounds etc. I could be monitored really well, but it is a 2 day flight to get to my moms so I wouldn't want to be leaving while things were getting dicy but well before they did. And then thinking that I can't imagine Ansley not seeing dad for that long. Gaah...my head is spinning

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aajatwins
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Re : Am I insane? Seriously am I?

Postby aajatwins » Wed Oct 13, 2010 01:46 pm

I agree. I think if you have that all planned out already, you're in great shape. Would it be possible for you to take some time off the island to do a preconception consult with an MFM? It might just put your mind at ease. Or if you could go ahead and see a doctor wherever your mom is and let them know what's going on. (Of course, they might be horrified that you'd actually leave once you told them the plan.) But about your husband not being there, I know that is hard part for him to miss (for both of you, really). But, assuming you do get pregnant and have baby, they will have years to spend with each other, God willing. The birth is an important moment, but baby won't remember. Daddy being there the rest of his life, he will remember. As long as you'll have a good support system there with your mom, too.

The air evac insurance should help you breathe a little easier, too!

alexa5
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Re : Am I insane? Seriously am I?

Postby alexa5 » Wed Oct 13, 2010 08:21 am

I think if you are willing and able to go off of the island that early, it sounds like a good plan to me. If you were staying on the island of course we would all worry about you :-), but since you have plans that allow for the health care you might need it sounds to me like you have made the right considerations. I am guessing you can get the basic medical care for the first 20 weeks on the island? Meaning bp and protein checks, etc?

hhbeachgurl
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Am I insane? Seriously am I?

Postby hhbeachgurl » Wed Oct 13, 2010 02:13 am

Thinking...Just barely- but a little more seriously and Dh is actually talking too....about trying again!

Ansley is now 3 and 1/2, she is perfect...head-strong, argumentative, creative, reading on a 3rd grade level self taught and doing 1st grade math and 2nd grade science. I have my hands full and am homeschooling her.

She desperatly wants a brother, but I think would be happy with a sister too. Tom and I have always talked about adopting since having her, but we just can't afford it and feel that option slipping away.

But....her is the BIG BIG but...

We have just moved for his job...to an island in the middle of the Bering Sea. He works for the clinic here...the only medical care in 800 miles! No babies are delivered here and they are not equiped to deal with anything remotely like my pregnancy last time nor even minor difficulties. Women are sent off island at 36 weeks here to where ever they want to have their child.

So I am guessing I am good till at least 20 weeks and would then head off the island with Ansley just to be safe and go to my mom's who lives in a large metropolotin area with good hospitals, perinatologists, and NICUs. But I would be without my husband. Am i nuts? Just please tell me, am I for even considering this with my history and where we live now?

Oh and we did just buy life flight insurance to medavc us out of here if needed LOL.

My History-
2 miscarriages, one at 9 weeks, one at 5 weeks and a year of TTC before getting pregnant with Ansley
Bed rest at 27 weeks, complete bedrest and PE diagnosis at 29 weeks- ambulance ride to hospital 2 hours away at same time, them sent home, hospitalized, sent home, hospitalized, oh just about every week. Hospitalized for good at 34 weeks, lost partial vision in one eye then, plus 4 reflexes, 3 beats of clonus, severe cerebral edema. Emergency C at 35 weeks. 3 days of Mag, and 4 weeks of post partum high BP.

BP now is normal....used to be 90's/50's before pregnancy....now 110-120/70s

Have not had any testing done although I highly suspect I have a clotting disorder of some sort.

Ok so seriously am I insane for even considering it living on a remote island in the Bering Sea or is leaving at 20 weeks to go someplace with great medical care a pretty safe bet?


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