Assistance during bedrest

Are you worried about your partners pregnancy? Has your partner already had preeclampsia? Do you have advice for other dads who could be going through similar experiences as yourself? Post here!
hfwarner3
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Re : Assistance during bedrest

Postby hfwarner3 » Tue Feb 15, 2005 10:19 am

Oh, one other thing I forgot to mention - she had gained five pounds since Thursday. That the peri did not like.

fiona
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Re : Assistance during bedrest

Postby fiona » Tue Feb 15, 2005 10:06 am

I'm so glad that people have rallied round and that you have such good support from your pediatrician and peri. The logistics sound daunting, but it's amazing what we can survive when we have to. I hope your wife's BP stays under control.

Fiona
dh Tom
ds Nate 12/8/97 - 14/8/97 26 weeks severe pre-e IUGR 1lb
ds Jay 4/11/98 30 weeks pre-e 3lbs 11 oz
no 3 due 15/6/05

frasiah
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Re : Assistance during bedrest

Postby frasiah » Tue Feb 15, 2005 10:01 am

Can I say husband and father of the year award!!!! You are doing amazingly well...

Frasiah
DD sev PE (29 weeks) 07/03/03
m/c 06/04
# 2 due 05/26/2005

hfwarner3
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Re : Assistance during bedrest

Postby hfwarner3 » Tue Feb 15, 2005 09:52 am

On another note, we have the world's greatest pediatrician. She goes to the same church we do and she heard about everything yesterday while picking up her kids (she works mornings six days a week so that she can have all afternoon with her kids). She is a very nice lady who keeps her kids important and is also a great doctor.

She called this morning and talked to my wife and I for 20 minutes! How is that for service!?!

She was upset about the lack of care my wife is getting. She recommended a different OB that she knows and suggested that I contact the current OB this afternoon to get copies of all my wife's records. If they ask, I can just tell them that it is for the Peri since we will give it to them as well. The Pediatrician was very upset that they sent my wife to the peri "flat footed" - no records, no results (since none done to date), no history, nothing.

The Pediatrician called the peri and let them know that she is the pediatrician on record and that she wants to work with them as things progress so that she knows what she will be handling post-NICU should it come to that. It was very cool.

The pediatrician also told us that we should not "over-worry". She told us that while this is serious, we are almost at a "good place" when she hits 28 weeks on Friday and that we just want to aim for 32 weeks right now. She said that it is almost certain that they would induce or give a c-section at 36 weeks if we make it that far, so it looks like we will have an April baby at the latest.

In talking to the peri, the pediatrician said that it sounds like our baby girl is actually developing a little ahead of schedule according to the ultrasound. She reminded us that ultrasounds can be almost as much art as science at times, but that it is not uncommon for PIH babies to mature a little sooner just like twins do. (I had never heard that before). The placenta and cord are apparently doing fine and the bloodflow is good from what the tech could see.

The "numbers" we are being given are about 90% right now should the baby be born today, but she would very likely have a lengthy stay in the NICU and long-term health problems. At 32 weeks, the survival number is "really good" and the chance of long-term health problems starts to "really drop off". We were also told "36 weeks is the goal at this point, but we would be happy with 34 and focused on 32 as our first goal."

Her BP today is a little higher than I would like (132/88) but it is under 140/90, so I'll take it. I will take it again between 4 and 5 and we will see where it goes. If she gets over 140/90 again, I am supposed to take it at every 2 hours after that. If she goes 6 hours straight with it over 140/90, I am supposed to call.

Thanks again. I will keep you informed as things move along. Gotta get back to work and keep the money coming in. :-)


hfwarner3
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Re : Assistance during bedrest

Postby hfwarner3 » Tue Feb 15, 2005 09:36 am

Lunchtime update - I am working from home today.

I talked to the church and I have someone who can take my daughter to school five days a week. I have someone who can take my son both days. I have someone who can watch the kids in the afternoon as needed. I have family at the house Friday - Sunday as needed. My mom also called a cleaning service and she is paying for them to come in once a week.

I am amazed by the willingness of people to help once they hear about what is going on. It really is starting to come together.

I am going to talk to my boss and the leader of the project I am on this afternoon and arrange a work schedule. Thursday's are my worst day to be out because 50% of my meetings are on Thursday. I almost have it worked out so that I can go in on Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday and my wife will only be home about 2 hours alone with our youngest daughter. We may not get any better than that.

I will still need to leave early each day, but that is okay since I end up working another hour or two most nights as part of this project. All the work is done by connecting to the servers from my laptop across the Internet, so it is work I can easily do at home.

Thanks again for all the advice and kind words. I was feeling so overwhelmed on Friday and I feel very confident that it will all work out today.

tommysmommy21004
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Re : Assistance during bedrest

Postby tommysmommy21004 » Tue Feb 15, 2005 08:52 am

Glad to hear that the blood work came back normal!!

Deanna Smith-Powers (30)

Mommy to Thomas James, b.2/10/04 @ 34 weeks due to severe pre-e and HELLP syndrome
Diagnosed with prothrombin genetic mutations-12/28/04

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catherine
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Re : Assistance during bedrest

Postby catherine » Tue Feb 15, 2005 08:03 am

Hi, can I suggest that you perhaps talk to the administrators at your sons preschool, and also the pastor at your church. They may be able to suggest specific neighbors or "class" parents who might be able to help with rides, or with drop by assistance. One thing for sure, your family isn't the first to send up in this kind of situation and often, once you ask, a whole helping of support may start to come your way. When I got sick, my husband was out of town on a business trip and the entire neighborhood (or so it seemed) stepped in to help, with food, with kid sitting, with lots of stuff.

You may not be able to preserve your usual "routine"... but I think that you'll find a way to be creative LOL!

Catherine
Mom to Finn, Lucy (preeclampsia and HELLP) and Chloe.

hfwarner3
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Re : Assistance during bedrest

Postby hfwarner3 » Tue Feb 15, 2005 07:53 am

Update - it was as I thought. The blood work came back ok, so they waited until this morning to call. Nerve-racking, but good news. They are going to let her stay home and have her come in next week for a follow-up.

frasiah
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Re : Assistance during bedrest

Postby frasiah » Tue Feb 15, 2005 06:29 am

You know, it seems like you are getting situated... at least your wife has a plan of action and you are sorting things on the home front. I am also glad that you have found a hospital in which you are comfortable. One lesson I am learning is that it is important to keep detailed notes of all OB visits for your own sanity and also to review later with other drs as needed. And in your case, your wife's notes saved the day. Please keep us informed about how you are doing and also your wife and kids. Shall continue to keep you in my prayers.

Frasiah
DD sev PE (29 weeks) 07/03/03
m/c 06/04
# 2 due 05/26/2005

hfwarner3
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Posts: 141
Joined: Fri Feb 11, 2005 11:10 am

Re : Assistance during bedrest

Postby hfwarner3 » Mon Feb 14, 2005 04:01 pm

One other note - I really dislike **** hospital. They deliver more babies there than any other hospital in the United States and you can tell. Everything about the place says volume, impersonal service, inefficiency, and speed.

The office staff were either rude or without personality. The nurses were frazzled and made at least 3 "big mistakes" that I saw. The biggest was not even reading the chart and trying to send my wife home instead of sending her to the lab for the blood draw. When I insisted that we were supposed to get blood drawn, she said that was not in the chart and directed us towards the exit. When I did not budge, she said, "Let me check with the doctor" and walked away. Just plain rude.

She sent a lab tech back who took us here, then there, then finally to the lab. They sat my wife in a chair to draw blood. Five minutes later, another nurse comes in and tells my wife, "Mam, you need to move." They made my wife stand against the wall until I got her the nurse's chair, which did not make the nurse happy. The doctor came back in and looked pretty upset over the chaos. She made it clear what needed to be done and the tech drew the blood and got the paperwork. Yes, she drew the blood in the office chair with my wife's arm drapped across the nurse's desk.

This is the same hospital that has been at over 100% capacity every month for the last 2+ years. We personally know 2 people who had to deliver their babies in the hallway at *** because there just plain were not any rooms. Even the overflow rooms were full.

Compare this to **** where people smile and say "Hello." Where the mom is put in one spot and everyone comes to her instead of moving the mom around. Where you feel like people are taking care of you and not just processing another patient.

If any of you are in the Atlanta area and looking for a hospital, I would not let my cat have kittens at ****. I am glad all our future Peri appointments will be at ****.

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