Louise - Thank you for sharing your little boy, Thomas. My daughter, Faith was born at 30 weeks and she lived for 25 days. She let out 2 little cries at her birth and one other time before she was really sick, it was so precious. Faith got NEC (Necrotizing Enterocolitis) and sepsis, infections I sure similar to your son. Then the rest of her organs couldn't survive, she was large amounts of steroids and oxygen. We let her go and were able to hold her on the machine for a while and then a short minute off the machines. I agree functioning with your baby in the NICU is so incredibly hard. So sorry we all have to meet in such a terrible way.
We want to try again also (probably in 6 months, we just lost Faith in January), but I am scared to death. I think I will watch myself much closer and put myself on bed rest, whether the doctor thinks it is necessary or not. Even though I have PIH with my son (he was born at 36 weeks, started having problems at 31 weeks) and then PE with my daughter (she was born at 30 weeks, started having problems at 27 weeks), my dr. thinks it is only a 15% of happening again. I think that is too low. I think the odds of HELLP do go down though.
Take care and good luck with deciding to have another baby.
Tyler - almost 4 (36 weeks, PIH)
Angel baby - 1/20/03 (11 weeks)
Faith Kristine - 1/5/04-1/30/04 (30 weeks due to severe preeclampsia, passed due to NEC (intestinal premie complication) & Sepsis)