Post Reply FAQ Members Login

Well I think we are done....

So, the baby's born, what comes next? Discuss your postpartum and parenting concerns here.

Well I think we are done....

Postby missgamecock » Thu May 13, 2010 10:39 pm

by missgamecock (6064 Posts), Thu May 13, 2010 10:39 pm

I think we are done with babies, lol. After thinking about it. I would love another one. However, Cate has been very high maintenance and had health issues the first year. Knowing I would be on bedrest most of the pregnancy. I'm 36. I have some sort of autoimmune disease that we can't figure out exactly. I show clear symptoms. My bloodwork just shows high inflammation. The fact that I would have to save up a ton of leave. We are getting out of spending so much for daycare. I pay $1300 a month for daycare right now. I would LOVE to have that money as spending money. With Sara going to kindegarden I get $650 of it back starting in September. I want to spend the time and have money to do it while they are still young.

Dh and I are talking. When Cate starts kindegarden, I think we are going to build a really nice house for us. With $1300 a month extra we could do it.

So I am going to wait till I am 40 (just to make absolutely sure). When I am 40, I am going to get a hysterectomy for the adenomyosis and the endometriosis. I am just going to enjoy my girls. I never thought I would say I was done having babies. I don't EVER want to have pe again. I just don't want to go through it. I have enjoyed not constantly being in my ob's office.
missgamecock
Registered User
 
Posts: 6064
Joined: Fri May 30, 2003 06:34 pm

Re : Well I think we are done....

Postby sonja » Thu May 13, 2010 11:06 pm

by sonja (5658 Posts), Thu May 13, 2010 11:06 pm

I know how hard this is for you Sabrina. I think that for me I will always think that one more kid would have been cool (for lack of a better word), but I think that a lot of the reasons that you listed are reasons that I too am glad that we stuck with two.

I hope that as time goes on the peace with your decision grows in your heart!
sonja
Forum Moderator
 
Posts: 5658
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2004 02:00 pm

Re : Well I think we are done....

Postby kara » Thu May 13, 2010 11:11 pm

by kara (6614 Posts), Thu May 13, 2010 11:11 pm

We only have one, and for many of the same reasons. I'm in denial about it at the moment, and I have a couple years to decide before I'm AMA, but it's looking less likely all the time. You have three wonderful girls - that's the good news. Hugs.
kara
Forum Moderator
 
Posts: 6614
Joined: Wed Jan 04, 2006 05:10 pm
Location: Midland, TX

Re : Well I think we are done....

Postby mnmom » Fri May 14, 2010 07:27 am

by mnmom (1419 Posts), Fri May 14, 2010 07:27 am

All good reasons. Honestly, I have never lost that baby love feeling. But I am with you in that I can see the end of the daycare years, and the ease of life as the kids gets older. Well, maybe not ease. You will have three teenage girls in the house!!! I went through two, and let me tell you, that extra money will be gone in a blink. Prom dresses, homecoming, sports, car insurance....:)
mnmom
Forum Moderator
 
Posts: 1419
Joined: Sun Mar 18, 2007 11:03 am

Re : Well I think we are done....

Postby missgamecock » Fri May 14, 2010 07:58 am

by missgamecock (6064 Posts), Fri May 14, 2010 07:58 am

It'a already going to DANCE. Kirsten takes 4 classes. Sara takes 2. They LOVE it. I am sure Cate won't be far behind. Next year Kirsten wants to take 3 classes and finale (practices every Saturday for finale). Sara wants to take 3 classes. 7 classes times $75 a costume. OWWWWWW. Plus tuition, shoes, pictures, recital tickets, etc. I pay for it because they love it and it teaches them great things. Kirsten is starting middle school next year. She is already, I want to join this and this and this.

The kicker is the autoimmune disease. I started lyrica a week ago and it has helped greatly. It helped with the fatigue, stiffness, and the pain from muscles and tendons around the joint. It still hasn't helped with swelling and pain in the joint. The drs think pregnancy set it off from Cate. So for now we are going to try some different drugs. Lyrica being one. We are just going to test my blood every 6 months. She thinks the Rheumatoid factor will show up eventually. She said sometimes it takes years to show up. knowing that, how could I even think about it. My girls need me.

Daycare is freaking expensive and going up all the time. We had a rate hike in January. Another hike in April. It was to cover costs. They go to a county nursing home that has a daycare center in it. They are talking about selling the nursing home to a private entity.

But the thing is all my payraises have been going to daycare. I want to go and have fun!!!! I am literally counting the days to when Sara starts school! $650 is a LOT of money per month to get back.

I want to have a bank of leave again (course that will get used up with a hysterectomy and being out six weeks).

Also, my ob's office has been sold to the hospital. Not sure what all that means. I am thinking and hoping that it is just an administrative change and there won't be changes in patient care. There has been another ob hired to join the office. She is graduating residency next month. I don't want to be stuck with whoever is on call. I am sure I would keep my ob as my dr. What if he was off that day and I went downhill. I don't want someone just out of residency touching me. I want someone who knows ME and knows how to handle PE.

My job has been awesome with me. They moved me to a hospital close to home so no more commute. They would work with me. I run the entire part of my dept at the hospital. Everyone within the network has so much to do, I couldn't and wouldn't want to be out for 6-8 months again. I got everything here running how I want it to run.

I noticed a lot of the people that I went to high school with. Their kids are so much older! There are a lot of them with teens and some are grandparents!
Like I said. I am waiting till I am 40 to make absolutely sure. Cause I say no way to babies at 40.
missgamecock
Registered User
 
Posts: 6064
Joined: Fri May 30, 2003 06:34 pm

Re : Well I think we are done....

Postby hannahsmom » Fri May 14, 2010 09:36 pm

by hannahsmom (1141 Posts), Fri May 14, 2010 09:36 pm

It's a hard decision, and you are wise not to do anything permanent yet. I wish I would have waited before making it permanent, but I knew that another pregnancy could have some really bad consequences. We were done with daycare, except for after school care, but now we are starting all over again with Brandon. We are daycare poor again, after being free from the huge fees for all these years! We are thrilled to have baby #2, but anymore babies would certainly put us in the poor house!
User avatar
hannahsmom
Registered User
 
Posts: 1141
Joined: Fri Apr 02, 2004 06:35 pm
Location: Florida


Return to After your baby is born .....

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests

cron