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HELP?!

Are you worried about your partners pregnancy? Has your partner already had preeclampsia? Do you have advice for other dads who could be going through similar experiences as yourself? Post here!

HELP?!

Postby dsp » Wed Mar 02, 2005 07:51 pm

by dsp (7 Posts), Wed Mar 02, 2005 07:51 pm

Ok, so I know I'm probably the same as every other person who first goes looking for info and comes across this site. But what the * is going on?
My wife self-diagnosed PCOS a couple of years ago. After two years of trying to conceive (which eventually meant self administered injections) we finally got the good news......PREGNANT!
The pregnancy started rough (bleeding) and we thought we would lose it. Fortunately, everything went well from there, until two weeks ago. At our regular check up the doc noticed my wifes blood pressure was high (150/90)and told us to keep an eye on her. A week later she was feeling unwell and went in for a check up, her BP was higher again (160/95) and so they admitted her to hospital overnight. This was week 28 and obviously a worry. Her BP settled however, and she was allowed home. In the next week she really swelled up (hands and ankles). The doc checked her again, BP still high, swelling and some protein in urine. She says this all looks like pre-eclampsia and that the baby may need to be born at any time.
To be honest, at this point I am sh*tting myself. Will the baby survive? Will it have problems? Will my wife survive? Are the docs doing the right thing? Should my wife stop work immediately? Will it help stop pre-e from developing?
I could certainly use some guidance here people!!!
Thanks for listening to my ramblings.
Cheers
David
dsp
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Re : HELP?!

Postby fiona » Wed Mar 02, 2005 08:29 pm

by fiona (5767 Posts), Wed Mar 02, 2005 08:29 pm

David,

From what you say, your wife is at around 29 weeks - which is good . Nevertheless it would be even better if you could squeeze a few more weeks. Did the Dr talk about your wife finishing work? I have had pre-eclampsia twice and would certainly have asked to be signed off with the symptoms you describe.

Have they started her on BP meds? Done a 24 hour urine? Blood work to check for kidney and liver damage?

Please be aware that pe can progress very quickly - if your wife's BP goes up, she feels pain under her right ribs or starts seeing spots or other visual disturbances, she needs to go straight to hospital.

When are you seeing the Dr again? It sounds like you need to have a very frank discussion about signs and symptoms and what their plan of care is for your wife. I really hope she can hang in there a little longer.

Fiona
dh Tom
ds Nate 12/8/97 - 14/8/97 26 weeks severe pre-e IUGR 1lb
ds Jay 4/11/98 30 weeks pre-e 3lbs 11 oz
no 3 due 15/6/05
fiona
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Re : HELP?!

Postby gordon k » Wed Mar 02, 2005 08:43 pm

by gordon k (113 Posts), Wed Mar 02, 2005 08:43 pm

First if you made a mess in your pants, you need to get new pants. Seriously, I know that it's nerve-wracking from personal experience, and that you're probably freaking out right now, but I want to help keep you calm if I can, --breathe.

It sounds like your doctors have diagnosed the preeclampsia. And, if she's at home, please monitor her, and if I were you, I'd take her in if she's showing any signs or symptoms of "red flags." I know that they're listed on this website--if you click on "About Preeclampsia" on the homepage, and then click on signs and symptoms, there's a list. But in short, spots, blindness, nausea, bad headaches, high blood pressure. These are what my wife had and the docs made her go to the hospital. My wife didn't work, she was on bedrest (in my non-medical opinion, it helped) and to tell you the truth, given the option she wouldn't have worked.

My wife and twins survived (her preeclampsia hit post-partum). I'm not a doctor and have no magic 8 ball, but hopefully you have a doctor that you totally trust with their lives (hopefully you have a high-risk OB as my wife did), have 24/7 access to medical care (via a nurse or labor & delivery), and know what to look out for for her (my wife got so bad she seemed cognizant at the time but doesn't remember). Take care of her and watch out for her, love her. Fortunately or unfortunately, it's up to us to be calm and reassuring for them. The best we can do is keep an eye on her, watch out for signs and symptoms, call your medical provider if you're concerned at all. Oh yeah, my wife also constantly made sure our kids were moving inside of her.

Arm yourself with knowledge and don't be afraid to act.

Hope and pray for the best...

Gordon

Gordon(38),
DW, Norlisa (35)
essential hypertension diagnosed before pregnancy, successfully treated with atenolol, post-partum preeclampsia
Joseph/Josephine Our Angel in Heaven (9/16/02)
Twins Mary Frances and Samuel (a.k.a. Frankie and Sammy) 38 2/7 weeks, 5/26/03
gordon k
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Re : HELP?!

Postby dsp » Wed Mar 02, 2005 09:43 pm

by dsp (7 Posts), Wed Mar 02, 2005 09:43 pm

Thank you both so much for your replies. I'm trying to stay calm and am hoping everything will work out. I think I will have a serious chat to the wife about stopping work as of today! Although we need the money (teachers just don't get paid enough!), I just don't think it is worth it.
I think I will also ring the doc and ask some more questions. Thank you all for being here and willing to help out. I'll let you know how it all goes.
Cheers
David
dsp
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Re : HELP?!

Postby gordon k » Wed Mar 02, 2005 09:55 pm

by gordon k (113 Posts), Wed Mar 02, 2005 09:55 pm

You're welcome. I don't have all the answers; I just want to help as much as I can.

Sounds like you're a reasonable guy; you know what to look out for, aren't afraid to go to the doctor, and put your wife and unborn baby ahead of everything else. No guarantees in this life, but what you're doing will hopefully help with success. Keep on doing what you're doing: getting informed about preeclampsia and watching out for your wife.

Good luck, and please keep us posted.

Gordon

Gordon(38),
DW, Norlisa (35)
essential hypertension diagnosed before pregnancy, successfully treated with atenolol, post-partum preeclampsia
Joseph/Josephine Our Angel in Heaven (9/16/02)
Twins Mary Frances and Samuel (a.k.a. Frankie and Sammy) 38 2/7 weeks, 5/26/03
gordon k
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Posts: 113
Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 01:18 pm

Re : HELP?!

Postby pigletmsu » Thu Mar 03, 2005 10:39 am

by pigletmsu (171 Posts), Thu Mar 03, 2005 10:39 am

If the doc will put your wife on medical bedrest, then if her work offers disability, all she has to do is file for it and you'll get part of her salary. I got disability for the 3 months of bedrest plus 8 weeks after delivery (c-section). I wouldn't have her quit, just go on medical leave, just incase. And if you're getting insurance thru her job, definitely go on leave, no quit. Then you'll still get the insurance.

And to answer your question, yes, she should probably go on bedrest at this point in my opinion. It will help prolong the pregnancy and every extra day in the womb is 2 days not in the NICU.

Lisa

DS 10/03 @ 34 weeks due to severe PE
#2 due 7/05
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Re : HELP?!

Postby meljoi » Fri Mar 04, 2005 06:39 am

by meljoi (510 Posts), Fri Mar 04, 2005 06:39 am

I went undiagnosed until 38 weeks and worked full time until I was diagnosed.
My swollen limbs and headaches were passed off as first time pregnancy issues.
I am grateful that all turned out well, but want to urge you to do all you can for her. I had never heard of PE until diagnosed and it floored me after discovering all that COULD have happened. I have successfully carried another babe and had NO signs of PE. You are taking all the right steps, monitor her-if the red flags and signs are there, don't even hesitate to get medical help. I think so many of us fear what that the Dr. will think we are nuts-I called my Dr. and his staff constantly throughout my second pregnancy. Always better to be safe than sorry.
I wish you and your wife the best of luck, keep us updated.
You have found an incredible source of information here-
in fact, if it weren't for this forum I don't know how I would've made it through pregnancy #2.

Melissa Joi 32
DH Jeremy 43
mama to Peyton John 12/04/00 (severe pre-e @ 38wks)
Lucy Isabelle born 11/16/04-normal, healthy pregnancy!
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/l/lucyisabelle/
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Re : HELP?!

Postby dsp » Sun Mar 06, 2005 05:12 pm

by dsp (7 Posts), Sun Mar 06, 2005 05:12 pm

Thank you all once again for the messages. It's amazing how many people don't know about pre-e, but equally amazing how many people who have had it are willing to help out.
Cherie has taken the last two days as sick leave, and I am trying to convince her to take the rest of the week off. We are watching her closely and mid way through week 29 it seems OK. I'm hopeful (but not optimistic) that we can get to week 34.
I get the feeling the doc is not too concerned at the moment (otherwise she would have demanded bed rest-right?), and from speaking to an aunt (who is a mid-wife), we are confident of at least getting through to week 32.
With a bit of luck it will work out that way and the baby will make it through OK. Of course with a bit more luck we will win the lottery and not have to worry about paying all the bills!!!!
Cheers until next time
David
dsp
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Re : HELP?!

Postby fiona » Sun Mar 06, 2005 05:56 pm

by fiona (5767 Posts), Sun Mar 06, 2005 05:56 pm

David,

not all Drs believe in bedrest - there's no evidence that it can stop/delay pe. What I personally believe it can do, is keep your bp stable, help the baby to grow and buy you some time (I'm certain it made a difference in my last pregnancy). In your wife's situation, I would stay home and rest as much as possible - the average time from diagnosis to delivery with pe is four weeks. Work can wait.

I'm glad things seem to have stabilised, but keep watching out for new and worsening symptoms. I really hope you make it to 34 weeks.

Fiona
dh Tom
ds Nate 12/8/97 - 14/8/97 26 weeks severe pre-e IUGR 1lb
ds Jay 4/11/98 30 weeks pre-e 3lbs 11 oz
no 3 due 15/6/05
fiona
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Re : HELP?!

Postby gordon k » Sun Mar 06, 2005 09:07 pm

by gordon k (113 Posts), Sun Mar 06, 2005 09:07 pm

David,

I agree with what Fiona said. Bedrest was also issued in my wife's treatment, and we followed her doctor's orders concerning: bedrest, a gestational diabetes diet, and making sure she took her atenolol medication and prenatal vitamins faithfully. Our doctor believed in it, we followed it for five months, and took a twin pregnancy to a 38 2/7 week induction with chronic hypertension, group beta strep, and gestational diabetes. We, too, believe that it was an important part of a successful pregnancy--her blood pressure never went up throughout the pregnancy with the bedrest and medication. If I were you, I'd try to keep my wife as rested as possible.

Work can wait, that is temporary. When preeclampsia strikes, if you're lucky its effects aren't permanent, but unfortunately sometimes they are.

I hope and pray for a good outcome; thanks for keeping us posted.

Gordon

Gordon(38),
DW, Norlisa (35)
essential hypertension diagnosed before pregnancy, successfully treated with atenolol, post-partum preeclampsia
Joseph/Josephine Our Angel in Heaven (9/16/02)
Twins Mary Frances and Samuel (a.k.a. Frankie and Sammy) 38 2/7 weeks, 5/26/03
gordon k
Registered User
 
Posts: 113
Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 01:18 pm

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