I had to go back to work in a childrens' hospital, it was very hard to go into the NICU, especially when I had to do studies on babies who were dying of what my daughter had (NEC). I still cry at any and all milestones; the bat mitzvah, ON her birthday, was especially difficult, and I took a LOT of teasing from family, friends, and the rabbi, but I know you all understand!
This year she wanted to go to Disneyland with some friends (you can go for free on your birthday). We took them and dropped them off, and I realized at the end of the day, FINALLY I had gotten through this day without a single flashback, for the first time. It took 14 years, but I really was focussed on the logistics of getting 6 kids to Anaheim rather than painful memories of her birth.