by sam10 (1437 Posts), Fri Oct 01, 2010 09:48 pm
I am so sorry that you are feeling scared and sad. I think that 8 months isn't actually that long of a time span all things considered. Being afflicted with Hellp and/or PE, loosing a child is a lot to deal with and I personally don't think it goes away so quickly. It is traumatizing.
When I think of trying again it often puts me into a panic and just like you, I am mostly afraid of dying. Even though statistically it is unlikely, but statistics don't have a soothing effect on me anymore.
I think it is important to take the time to heal and grieve and allow feelings of fear. I hope that someday my wish for another baby will be stronger than my fear of dying. Take care and be gentle with yourself. I am trying the same for myself.