My first post was deleted, so will try this again.
First, congrats on your little one's arrival! Sounds like she's doing well all things considering.
Second, husbands have a horrible time with PE/PIH pregnancies too. Its stressful for them to watch them struggle during a time that should be happy. And if they're asked to do more around the house and take care of older children, when they're not used to it, it adds to their stress levels. (Not saying its right, but it does happen) My hubby really struggled the last few wks, and hated feeling powerless to help. Most men are problem-solvers and PE doesn't allow much for them to solve.
PUmping. I wasn't able to pump/nurse for our daughter after the PE. At 10 days she was only on formula. The basic 1-side pump wasn't enough and I didn't realize I had double electric options. When I had our son in 2009, I was more prepared. I had a double-electric pump: Medela Pump In Style Advanced. Its available in most big box stores (Babies R Us is more expensive for the actual pump unless on sale, I got mine at Target on sale for $210 w/ baby registry coupon). You can also buy on Craigslist and EBay, some are new, some are used for just a few wks, others are used for 1+ yrs. If used, you can buy replacement tubing and parts and carefully wipe the surface of the pump (follow manual instructions). With medela, the little white membranes need replacement after 2-3 mos (for me it was 2 mos, manual said 3 mos).
try hands-free pumping (I used rubberband setup) and distract yourself during pumping - read a magazine, watch the news, take deep breaths, have a protein snack. Try breast compressions. Try motherlove.com's supplements. Make sure you're not taking decongestants or allergy meds as they can help dry you up. Check out Kellymom.com's website for tips and FAQs, there's lots of good info on there. (no relation to me, just a good site I found when I struggled)
ANd give yourself kudos for what you can do and have already done.
2005: PE/IUGR pregnancy with Daughter, born 40+2 induction. Diagnosed with Sensory Processing Disorder (or Sensory Integration Dysfunction) in 2010. Diagnosed with ADHD in 2011. It's getting better with OT and treatment!
2009: PIH pregnancy with Son, born 38+5. Diagnosed in 2011 as Developmental Language Delays, Social-Emotional-Communication Delays. More testing Nov. 2011.
2011: I'm undergoing neurological testing. Praying for the best!