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flashbacks

Postby dolphincrazy316 » Fri Feb 25, 2011 12:43 am

by dolphincrazy316 (116 Posts), Fri Feb 25, 2011 12:43 am

Well its been over a year since we lost baby Alex. Here lately I have been having these flashbacks of being in the hospital. Its like it just happened! I keep going back to the doctors rushing me in for an emergency c-section and I feel like im loosing him all over again...has this happened to anybody else and what did u do? Could this be PTSD? please help
Hayden born 4-2-05 2lbs 2oz due to preeclampsia, spent 9 weeks in the NICU

Alex Bradley born in the arms of angels on 11-22-09 1lb 10oz due to preeclampsia and complete placental abruption

Baby #3 due Feb 2012
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Re: flashbacks

Postby cmccaffrey » Fri Feb 25, 2011 01:05 pm

by cmccaffrey (458 Posts), Fri Feb 25, 2011 01:05 pm

I have no idea what it is, but I have those a lot too... I don't even know how they trigger. I could be standing in line at the grocery store and it will wave over me. I will ask my therapist about it when I see her because if you're anything like me, those visions/feelings really mess up my day and make it hard to do anything else.
Hope someone else has more answers.
Christa (25) & J (26)
Mommy to:
Mason born 10.11.10 @ 30+3 wks due to Severe Pre-E. Only lived 2.5 days
Noah born 2.1.12 @ 38 weeks thanks to lots of doctors visits, LDA, Lovenox and no preeclampsia!

learn more about our story... http://tinyurl.com/7a979vy
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Re: flashbacks

Postby jean » Fri Feb 25, 2011 05:55 pm

by jean (675 Posts), Fri Feb 25, 2011 05:55 pm

This happens to me ALL of the time!:~( I relieve every horrible moment of it over and over again and I can picture it like it just happened. It is so miserable. (It's been a year for me too)
Our first son was born and passed in Feb of 2010. Born at 29 weeks due to HELLP and passed due to NEC. We miss him every day. :~(

Our second son was born at 39 weeks gestation in Nov of 2011. No HELLP or pre-e! Took LDA starting at week 12 and went off of it at week 38!

http://findingtherainbowconnection.blogspot.com/
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Re: flashbacks

Postby kerisue » Fri Feb 25, 2011 11:47 pm

by kerisue (623 Posts), Fri Feb 25, 2011 11:47 pm

Now I only have a Bachelors in Psych, not a PhD, but if you ask me, YES it is PTSD. We went through a huge trauma, a trauma that resulted in the ultimate loss, the loss of our child. I hate it. Mine dont occur frequently, but when they do it's usually when I'm trying to go to sleep :(
Mama to Millie
born June 2010 @ 24 wks. gestation due to my severe PE and CHF
lived 25 days, loved and missed
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Re: flashbacks

Postby kristina » Sat Feb 26, 2011 01:35 pm

by kristina (11 Posts), Sat Feb 26, 2011 01:35 pm

Yes it happened to me as well. I saw a therapist and they said it's PTSD. Just after I lost our child it was quite regular, but it gradually got less and now I don't get it at all. I don't specifically know what helped me, maybe it was talking to a therapist about it, maybe it was just time. I remember I was quite terrified when it happened so often and I felt like I was losing my mind, but my therapist assured me my feelings were normal and from my experience it went away. It's been over 3 years for me since we lost our child. The pain of losing my child will always be with me, but I don't get flashbacks anymore. Like kerisue said, we went through a huge trauma and that affects one on many levels. You are not alone. Hope it helps a little bit.
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Re: flashbacks

Postby angieb » Sun Feb 27, 2011 09:55 am

by angieb (1192 Posts), Sun Feb 27, 2011 09:55 am

Mainly I'd start having flashbacks when I was driving to work. Random idle thoughts wandered into something about her/losing her/ etc. and then it was like reliving it. Never the same bad parts, it was always something different.

For me, they've stopped, probably around the 1 year mark about.
Me (29) DH (30)
#1-Olivia Caetlyn-9-28-09-9-28-09, 23+2 wks, emergency classic c-section, class I HELLP, IUGR
#2- Lucas Oliver (rainbow baby)- April 2011, 36+2 wks, HELLP and pre-e free! (lovenox and LDA pregnancy)
#3-Matthew, late October 2012...mostly normal, 37 wks, (lovenox and LDA again)
My blog: http://www.butterflies-and-rainbows.blogspot.com/
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Re: flashbacks

Postby dolphincrazy316 » Sun Feb 27, 2011 06:00 pm

by dolphincrazy316 (116 Posts), Sun Feb 27, 2011 06:00 pm

For me the last several days have been awful. The flashbacks are coming more frequent. I have suffered from panic attacks for a really long time..now everytime i have aflashback, i end up having a panic attack..i just dont know what to do..I have been to the dr several times for the attacks but the meds they put me on doesn't seem to help at all..so now i just dont know what to do about it...any advice is welcome...thanks in advance!!
Hayden born 4-2-05 2lbs 2oz due to preeclampsia, spent 9 weeks in the NICU

Alex Bradley born in the arms of angels on 11-22-09 1lb 10oz due to preeclampsia and complete placental abruption

Baby #3 due Feb 2012
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Re: flashbacks

Postby kerisue » Sun Feb 27, 2011 07:01 pm

by kerisue (623 Posts), Sun Feb 27, 2011 07:01 pm

Anti-anxiety medication can help with panic attacks though it sounds like you may already be on that. Have you tried counseling as well? I have a friend who also experiences panic attacks (not grief related) and her therapist has tried a combination of talk therapy and practical techniques (how to prepare for an attack, how to minimize it, how to deal with it in the moment) that have really seemed to help her. A local organization has folks who have also experienced pregnancy/infant losses that I can call anytime of the day or night. That's really helped me. Maybe your area has something similar? Good luck. Image
Mama to Millie
born June 2010 @ 24 wks. gestation due to my severe PE and CHF
lived 25 days, loved and missed
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Re: flashbacks

Postby rosemary » Mon Feb 28, 2011 10:30 pm

by rosemary (2360 Posts), Mon Feb 28, 2011 10:30 pm

Have you called your doctor and discussed the meds that you are currently taking? There might be something else that might be more beneficial. Maybe give them a call and let them know that you're continuing to have panic attacks.

It's already been mentioned, and I second the thought about counseling or a loss support group. Your physician maybe able to suggest a counselor, and local hospitals often have connections with support groups.

Wishing you peace and healing. (((HUGS)))
Rosemary - 47 - Central, PA
Momma to Kayleigh 8/25/88 - 36 weeks
Elliott 8/29/04 - lost at 20 weeks due to severe PE/HELLP
Proud Grandma to Max Allen 10/19/10.
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