by megs304 (2 Posts), Thu Nov 04, 2010 09:11 am
Good morning ladies,
I'm in Central Queensland, and my 2nd daughter, Grace has just had her 5th birthday. She was born at 35 weeks after 6 weeks of bedrest and hospitalisation to try to keep my PIH under control. It was finally discovered that I had HELLP and the decision to take her was made and a surgeon was flown up to Toowoomba from Brisbane for the task, I spent another 5 days in ICU bringing everything under control and another 2 back to normal. I can't remember much of that except the appalling nurse-in-training who had bedside duty for the first couple of days - trust me she was no substitute for not being able to hold my little baby! My first preganancy - with the same father, was to all appearances, normal.
I would love to hear who has had bubs, hoping you are all well and happy and trouble free and who is enjoying the life they have been given.
I've chosen not to try for further babies. My reasons are, in no particular order:
* I was 38 when Grace was born (obviously 5 years older now)
* I don't live near any reasonable medical care - if I was still in Sydney near the Royal Womens Hosp I may have chosen differently
* I want to see the girls I have grow up more than I want a 3rd child (it took 18 months to fully accept this fact)
* I am still not well, though there is nothing we can pick as definitively being wrong
* I continued to suffer from HBP for 4 years after Grace's birth.
* I am still over-weight, regardless of trying various methods to lose it.
Each circumstance is different, and you need to choose for yourself. The girls are without a doubt worth everything I went through, but would I risk their mother for another? No. If I didn't have them, possibly - but I would make sure I had easy access to GOOD medical care, specialising in high risk pregnancies. It is all about weighing up the risks and benefits for yourself. What is acceptable to you may not be acceptable to someone else. Doesn't mean they are right or wrong - just no you!
...and yes, after 5 years I still grieve for what might have been - but only when life gives me that 15 minutes to ponder, the rest of the time I'm too busy laughing at my wonderful girls and fantastic hubby to remember!