Well, never thought I'd come back here again. Thought I'd give an update on life after HELLP x 2.
I had HELLP in 2005 with my now 6 year old daughter. She was born at 29 weeks, 5 days. My Hellp was severe and I was put out under general and required a platelet transfusion. For my first baby, it was needless to say, stressful. 5 weeks later, I took my preemie home.
It took me 3+ years to TTC again, after underlying disorders tests and seeing a HELLP specialist, ******, who practices in my area. I tested - for all the disorders, got the go ahead, lost weight, took what he said to take (not aspirin, allergic) and got pg within 2 months. He told me I'd make it to 36 weeks. He was wrong. I was on bedrest at 21 weeks with HBP and put on meds. Within the next 8 weeks, I was hospitalized FIVE times, the fifth, I told them NOT to send me home again, and within 4 days or so, I developed HELLP AGAIN and was delivered at------- 29 weeks and 5 days to the day of my last delivery. I didn't need a transfusion this time, only got an epidural so I could be awake, and OVERALL, the delivery went smoother...the pregnancy though, was MUCH MUCH MUCH more stressful. Gage spent 5 weeks in the NICU.
So, here I am, 3.5 years later. Both kids are happy and MOSTLY healthy. Gage is still working on his preemie lungs. He gets frequent colds/infections. He also got a touch of asthma from his daddy which doesn't help matters. DH got a vasectomy a couple months after Gage was born at my request. I have been ok until.......today. I just lost 35 pounds on a new eating plan called Fat to Skinny Fast and Easy. I'm WELL under pre-preg weights and smaller than I have been since college---like 1998....crazy. At church today there was a tiny little precious baby girl. She was fussing and her grandpa had brought her out and I stopped to talk to her and she instantly stopped crying. I just wanted to bring her home LOL!!!! And then it hit me.....I can't have any more kids. So, I'm totally bummed ever since. I know it's CRAZY to even THINK about it, and I would never DO IT, but it's just sad I can't I guess. And adoption is basically off the table as far as DH is concerned......so---------blah. I am happy with the two healthy kids I have, I just wanna say, HELLP and PRE-E SUCK. And no one deserves to have their choices and happiness taken away.
Have you suffered from HELLP syndrome or had a pregnancy complicated by an underlying disorder? Discuss your concerns here
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