I'm sorry you are having such a hard time. I really hope the SNS helps you both and that he will give in soon!
With my twin boys, I wanted so badly to nurse for a year or close to it. But after a bad round of thrush, one twin with a bad latch & reflux, and very little sleep for the first 6 weeks, I was also very defeated. I would have a good talk with a LC or my friend who is a LLL leader and then it would all go downhill again in a matter of days. We made it through that first growth spurt, but then I cracked at the second one. I can see on this side of it what I needed to do, but it was so hard in the midst of it. I think when frustration gets to a certain level, then anxiety builds with each nursing session. And of course, the anxiety carries over to baby and everyone is too tense to make anything work properly. If you can't make it work, don't make yourself crazy over it. I hated formula when we switched and I was guilt-ridden for months over it. But my twin who had always been smaller became the bigger twin when we switched to bottles/formula - and he's been bigger every since. It was better for him!
And this time, I am much more comfortable with nursing in general, having done it before. I'm much more relaxed and able to work through the issues that come up. I hope that gives you a little hope.
