is 4mths too early ?

[bsherricca]

panic attack last night ..am i ttc too early ? it has been 4 months since our loss. my doc has done the usual tests (clotting disorders etc.....nothing) he has said i can go ahead and ttc . i have been one month on bc because of my pcos but my arms are so empty ...is it too early ? how long did u guys wait to TTC after PE ?

[sam10]

The decision when to TTC after a loss (assuming that the docs gave the green light) is very personal and varies from person to person. I was not allowed to start before 9 months after I gave birth due to my classical c-section (due to my age the doc allowed an earlier start than what is usually recommended after a classical) . And after this 9 month waiting period, I was not ready. I was panicked and emotionally just not there yet. We decided to wait until Henry's first birthday. For us, this felt exactly right.

[angieb]

My OB told me 3 months,my MFM said 6 months (due to the classical c-section). We started TTC right at 3 months but in reality it took just under a year for me to get pregnant. In hindsight, I am VERY glad we had that year...I didn't think we "needed" it, but in hindsight, we definitely did. Grief is exhausting and draining, TTC again after a loss SUCKS--you worry about getting pregnant (and if you can), you worry about your next pregnancy, it just stinks. But nothing can really prepare you for how hard a subsequent pregnancy is, it is so incredibly stressful and emotional and draining. I am glad that the grief was *as* fresh because it would have just made both the pregnancy and getting through that first year all the more difficult.

[holly3372@msn.com]

I agree that after the docs green light , it then becomes a personal decision. I too had a classical csection. I was told after 9 months, then also decided after Ben's first birthday had passed, then after the first death date. Well, almost 2 years later now I am pregnant again at age 40!! I never thought I would be in this place. However, like others have said I too needed time to grieve and process so so much. I still grieve my son., I always will but I am in a much different place today then I was before. Am I scared, oh yes but I feel more able to cope at this point. Only you will know what's right for you. It is not easy and you are not alone. Let yourself feel what you are feeling and go from there. Thinking of you.

[princess purr]

I was told 6 to 9 months, but to give myself time to emotionally heal...well it's been almost 8 years and I have divorced and remarried and honestly, I am still waking up in a panic every once in awhile at the thought of trying again. I'm going through the retesting process right now since it has been so long and who knows what has changed, but I'm still scared. I think after losing a baby a person is always going to be nervous when try again. So, just follow your heart and good luck!

[bsherricca]

i have a consult with a fertility specialist this evening ....i'm nervous ....we've only been trying a few weeks but as soon as i was off the bc on came the hot flashes ...sighs ...wish me luck...i'm praying for good news we are trying to avoid clomid this time ...wish me luck ...so nervous !!!