Lauren,I made it through with most of my sanity intact (I'm sure some would beg to differ! ) through two subsequent pregnancies. It's so hard. Your eyes are so open to everything. You know too well that pregnancy is not a promise. And while those wide open eyes to everything that can happen make it all extra scary- it's also what you can rely on to provide you a little measure of comfort that you are an experienced momma. This pregnancy is different, and you are different- forever touched by your sweet twins.
I know its cliche, but one day at a time. A friend told me to "fake it, til I make it." So while I was uber scared to be excited or get attached to our 2nd, I did things anyway- took belly pictures, talked to baby, tried to do all the normal pregnancy things- along with all the non-normal things like having a spreadsheet of my care... doctors on "text" support... and the knowledge of how many days I was from viability and what my lil' one looked like at the same gestation their older sib was born. I also sought counsel from a psychologist that specialized in medical trauma and learned relaxation strategies that I credit with saving some of my sanity and a very peaceful birth.
One day- one week at a time- and lean on us and other friends and family who understand when you need.
Thank you so much for your encouraging and supportive words. I am trying to do all the things that helped you. It helps to have the support of women who have been through it as you have.