Terrified of the unknown

Are you pregnant again after having preeclampsia once already in a previous pregnancy? Post your thoughts/concerns here - there are others who share your feelings. This is also the home of our Bedrest Buddies Support group.

Terrified of the unknown

Postby ashleyhae » Thu Oct 24, 2013 09:54 pm

We lost our precious baby girl this past March and are almost 7 weeks pregnant now. Deciding to try again wasn't a difficult decision for us, but now that it has happened we are terrified. Overwhelming feelings keep flooding me over malia's loss. We knew going in that it would be a long hard road but at only 7 weeks there's a lot more to go. Any tips from moms who have been down this path are greatly appreciated!
Ashley
Mommy to Malia born March 15, 2013 at 29 weeks due to severe preeclampsia.
She spent 2 precious days with us that we will forever cherish.
Baby #2 due 6/16/14
ashleyhae
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Re: Terrified of the unknown

Postby MomTimesThree » Fri Oct 25, 2013 03:10 am

Pregnancy after loss can be scary... and so complex emotionally. It can be overwhelming to consider everything that is unknown- try focus on what you do know. What your plan for monitoring is, the good news that is for sure- baby's HB, measurements, when the next appointment is etc. And I know it sounds super cliche, but one day at a time. Set yourself small meaningful goals and know this is a different pregnancy, and you are a different mama- with all the wisdom that your sweet Malia has given you.

And feel free and vent! :)
Lauren
2008-Our Baby Girl, PTL born too early at 30w6d, Fought so hard... Forever Loved & Missed
2010- Lil' Bro, Pre-E at 29 weeks... Induced at 36w6d, Born 37w
2012- Lil' Sis, Super-imposed pre-e at 25 weeks, PTL & GD at 35 weeks, Evicted 36w
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Re: Terrified of the unknown

Postby elg » Tue Oct 29, 2013 12:30 am

I completely understand. My son was born at 25 weeks and he passed away 7 days later all due to pre-e. I am pregnant again and have been terrified, but today I am 30 weeks and 2 days and so very thankful. So far no signs of pre-e!! I agree with the above poster. One day at a time and little milestones. Some days you will have positive thoughts and other days you won't. You just have to feel what you feel and focus on what you can look forward to. Thinking of you.
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Re: Terrified of the unknown

Postby ashleyhae » Tue Nov 05, 2013 02:18 pm

Thank you! I'm now just over 8 weeks, and am loving the team I choose. They have done a 24 hour urine collect to get my baseline. They also did a lot of genetic testing when I had my pre pregnancy consult. They call with every result and just make me feel cared about. I have an ultrasound next thursday again to measure growth and hoping all looks great like it did at my 6 week appointment!
Ashley
Mommy to Malia born March 15, 2013 at 29 weeks due to severe preeclampsia.
She spent 2 precious days with us that we will forever cherish.
Baby #2 due 6/16/14
ashleyhae
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Posts: 17
Joined: Wed Sep 11, 2013 01:40 am

Re: Terrified of the unknown

Postby sam10 » Tue Nov 05, 2013 09:49 pm

I am so sorry you lost your precious baby.It is so very hard to be pregnant again after a loss. And no matter how much time passes, a pregnancy brings back a lot of memories.
What helped me was that I tried to have a sense of control. Like you, I had a great medical team. I also chose to be seen by a therapist to help me through my pregnancy. I focused on myself and made sure that my needs (emotionally and physically) were met as much as possible. I stopped compromising :D
And sometimes when the panic set in, I just took one step after the next, one day at a time. Sending you hugs.
~Julija (40)
MC 3/2009 and 3/2011
Henry (1/1/2010-1/7/2010) - forever loved and missed; severe PE with Hellp; partial placental abruption, classical c-section at 25.6 weeks
Matilda (Nov. 2012, born at 35.4 weeks) - severe PE


Our pain has been put into words, placed into empty cradles, to remember that all our babies lived, that they mattered and always will. - Field of Cradles http://www.fieldofcradles.org/
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