by timelessbeauty (1712 Posts), Tue Dec 14, 2004 12:17 am
Thank you Alissa for your posting. I enjoy hearing from those who share the common bond of Pre-eclampsia. I was scared the first time I had it with my oldest daughter but I was frightened when I had it with my late son. I have so much respect and admiration for moms like you who endured watching your babies be hooked up to monitors and giving the good fight. When my son passed, I could only find solace in that he had not suffered via tubes, wires or needle sticks. I felt he passed in the comfort of still being held by his mother, even if in utero. I know that when the end does come for those who fight the good fight, they too get held in that wonderful embrace known as Parental love. And for those parents, what a special gift to watch life be awakened and then gracefully passed to sleep yet experiencing the miracle of that little personality in between.
I donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t think of myself as strong but more stubborn than anything else. My late husband was manic depressive and I had to be there for him but that was not without handling my own moments of weakness. I have come to realize that I cry more often when I am pregnant than when I am not. ItÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s a relief to get those emotions out of my system at the time, which may have been bottled up from before pregnancy. We all have known the sadness and joy of contemplating trying to conceive again, wondering what will happen this time around? We sometimes under estimate our own strength of character to be able to go through it again. Look at what we have been through? IsnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t that a testament to how strong each one of us is just to endure that?
For those of you who were reading the postings of Allie, the sweet cherub that passed this summer, I weep for her family knowing they have been strong. Even when they felt weak, they were strong for acknowledging their weakness and recognizing itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s all natural and human emotion. I think of what I have been through and donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t know myself what I would do in a situation like that. I can only admire those that have handled it and find strength in what they have accomplished.
In the back of my mind, I think about, not my journey, but the journey coming up for my daughters. Will they be able to have kids without problems? Will they be introduced to the fears of pregnancy while feeling young and invincible? My oldest daughter was born with Urinary Relux stage II which is a congenital dysfunction that can heal itself. The valves that go from the ureter tubes to the bladder donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t shut all the way leading to urine backing up the tubes to the opening of the kidney whenever she would lay down at night. She suffered two back to back urinary tract infections at 1 yr of age with temperatures that branched over 104 degrees. She was on low dose antibiotic for many years until she grew out of the condition and the valves learned to close on their own. But what damage was done to the kidneys the one time she developed a kidney infection and was hospitalized with a 105.8 fever? How will this affect her chances of surviving Pre-e if she chooses to have children when she grows up? Will she even be someone to get Pre-e? ItÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s not for what I have suffered and have survived that I champion the cause of Pre-eclampsia research. I champion the cause for my two Ã¢â‚¬Å“Lil BeautiesÃ¢â‚¬Â at home so that they may enjoy the miraculous world of motherhood unaffected or with better treatment to help stave off any threat to them or their children.
So for those in Indiana that are as passionate about Pre-e funding, research, and saving the lives of children yet to be born, I ask you to write to me so we can help each other figure out a way to gather funds, host events and get the word out to women everywhere about the dangers and blessings of having and surviving Pre-e! Even if you are not in Indiana but can help in anyway, I welcome your thoughts, messages, and help!
Sorry for the long winded posting but like I said, IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢m passionate about this.
By the way, I canÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t tell you how excited I get when I see that someone besides myself has posted here! :-)