My daughter is doing well in the NICU, that is what they tell me. She is no longer on any kind of oxygen other than just breathing room air. She is up to 12 cc's per feeding (gavage). They DC'd the bili light b/c her labs were low enough that they said she doesn't need it.
So why am I so terrified that I'm going to get a call telling me the worst? Is it my natural propensity to worry, I have serious anxiety issues. Or is it normal to worry this much when you have a little one in the NICU? She was a 30 weeker. Their survival rates are fairly high, are they not?
I'm just wondering if I'm going nuts. It's so hard to have her there and me be here at home. It feels so empty. Right now I want to get in the car and drive to see her, but I'm still not supposed to drive.
Today they put her to my breast for non-nutritive sucking, it was so wonderful. She didn't really suck, she just had her mouth on my nipple, and fell asleep. I love her so much already, this is so hard, I feel like I'm being a total baby about the whole thing.