by Guest (), Wed Feb 24, 2010 05:34 pm
Ack - I don't know if I'll make it to more than 1000! I'm nearing the halfway mark and I'm still barely over 300. I guess I'll just have to wait and see... and Jamie, if memory serves I do tend to pee more at night than during the day too. So it is very possible that things will pick up here.
What is concerning my are my dumb blood pressures. I'm get a lot of 175/105 (+/- 5) readings. And I am not doing ANYTHING. I'm sitting here. I'm not on bedrest, but I've been taking it easy today due to my bps. So frustrating!!! I'm going to see the doctor tomorrow morning anyway so I'll have them check my bp while I am there. Maybe I am due for a medication increase.
I feel like I am trying to just WILL this to be a normal and healthy pregnancy. Sometimes I feel like my optimism borders on denial. I just so badly want to get through this healthy. But I know you all understand that feeling... I can't tell know if I really BELIEVE this will be a healthy and normal pregnancy, or if that is just my overwhelming desire.
This will sound strange... but if I go down the pre-e and HELLP road again, I almost feel like I am letting everyone down. My husband, my parents, everyone in my family was scared when they found out I was pregnant again. Happy, but scared. And I really spouted a lot of propaganda to everyone convincing them that things would be different this time and the chances were I'd have a perfectly healthy pregnancy. I feel like I'm letting everyone down if I get sick again - even though rationally I know it isn't my fault.
OK, vent over.