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Boy preemies vs. Girl Preemies-UPDATED!

Are you part of the NICU club? Do you have a child who is still struggling with the effects of being born too soon from preeclampsia? Share your concerns and stories here among parents who have been there.

Boy preemies vs. Girl Preemies-UPDATED!

Postby caitlynsmama » Tue Mar 29, 2005 07:40 am

by caitlynsmama (436 Posts), Tue Mar 29, 2005 07:40 am

I would love to hear from some of you who are preemie parents as to how it is with a boy preemie? The NICU frightened me with the statistics about boy preemies and survival rates. I am going for my 19 week ultra sound and am prepared to be told it is a boy but if it is and it comes early, I would love to know some good success stories. My little Caitlyn has been a spit fire since she was born so I know if this one has her zest for life, we will be fine.

Shannon Mommy to Caitlyn Elizabeth 30 weeks, 3 days born (8/26/2003) early due to PE, IUGR, HELLP syndrome, premature rupture of membranes

Currently expecting #2 EDD-8/23/05
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Re : Boy preemies vs. Girl Preemies-UPDATED!

Postby youtan » Tue Mar 29, 2005 07:59 am

by youtan (1592 Posts), Tue Mar 29, 2005 07:59 am

Hi Shannon,

I completely understand your worries. I was told the same statistics only after he was already born. Who knows how it will all turn out? We can only pray and hope and remember that miracles do happen.

Nathanial did have his struggles in the NICU, but he managed to pull through. For us, the fact that we'd not ever been around 'normal' babies was a blessing, because our experience was 'normal' to us. The 2nd baby is difficult because you've seen what can happen and hate to watch another one struggle.

I consider Nathanial a success story - tho' I know I take it for granted the miracle he really is...

Tanya (31)
Local Group Moderator & Kansas Coordinator
Nathanial 3/6/99 HELLP 27 wks, 1lb 10oz
Jonathan 8/9/02 PIH/low fluid 34 wks, 4lb 8 oz
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Re : Boy preemies vs. Girl Preemies-UPDATED!

Postby raindrop » Tue Mar 29, 2005 08:01 am

by raindrop (454 Posts), Tue Mar 29, 2005 08:01 am


I know Wyatt is not near as early as some here, being almost 35wks, but so far his worst has been reflux and asthma (early). He didnt have to spend any extra time in the nursery or anything, we only had to stay until Mon mon ning when they could do a second echo on him to make sure the murmur (forget which they called it now) was closing up. He did spend almost 2 days under billi lights though. Whitney was 36wks and her biggest thing was having to stay under billi lights for about a day then for about 4-5 days after we got to go home had to bring her back to hospital for them to check her levels.

Like I said I know mine werent that early but Im sure some of the others will chime in before long. Good Luck on the U/S

Donna - 33
Richard - 33
Whitney Lynn Rochelle- 6-27-99 - (36 wks due to severe PE) 5lbs 2oz 18in long
Wyatt Elijah Lawrence- 7-3-03 (34wks 6days due to severe PIH/PE) 4lbs 6.8oz 17in long
William Parker Thomas - 2-22-05 (38wks 5days - mild pih, gallstones and gestational diabetes) 7lbs 3.4oz 20 1/4in long

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Re : Boy preemies vs. Girl Preemies-UPDATED!

Postby denise » Tue Mar 29, 2005 08:27 am

by denise (5480 Posts), Tue Mar 29, 2005 08:27 am

I didn't find out about these "stats" until after I had DD and the nurses mentioned something. Ariana at 35 weeks had what I call normal preemie behaviors--some oxgen problems, but not major; the feed & growing bit; and the lack of the suck-swallow-breath reflex. She did fine as time went on.

My girlfriend has her son at the end of Jan this year at 34 weeks due to PROM. He came in at a whopping 6.13 and 21 inches. Her firstborn was early too, and weighed a huge amount also. Max didn't do so hot with the oxygen and did have to be on a vent for a couple days. The nurses did mention it to her about the boys vs girls stats and Charity was not all the happy to hear this. He is doing okay now and spent 13 days in the hospital. They did send him home with an apnea monitor, but they only ended up using it for a short period of time. He's doing fine breathing wise now.

Please don't worry too much about it. I know it's hard to not worry, but what happens will happen. Just make sure to take care of you, so you can carry this baby as close to term as possible. Let us know how the U/S goes!

Denise (29) Co-coordinator for WI
Jason (32)
Ariana (22 months)5/3/03-just shy of 35 weeks: Class 1 HELLP
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Re : Boy preemies vs. Girl Preemies-UPDATED!

Postby jenn » Tue Mar 29, 2005 09:08 am

by jenn (2038 Posts), Tue Mar 29, 2005 09:08 am

Hey sweetie, don't worry so much. Boy or girl - this baby is gonna' be GREAT!
Sure the satistics show that girls do much better when born premature.... but it's just a satistic.
IF I though about satistics too much - heck- I'd never get in car, fly, wear a shirt with horizontal stripes ;o)

Just sit back, kick up your feet and think happy PE-Free thoughts!
I really attribute these happy thoughts to getting me to my 38th week with Natalia.
I know it's a scary time and it's hard not to let these thoughts cunsume your mind... but do try :o)

And off the top of my head, we have a few members with great preemie boy stories to share... Our own Ethan was born just over 1 pound and he just celebrated his 1st birthday! And our good friend "T" is the proud mommy of Casey (whom I've betrothed to Natalia ;o)

Big hugs, I know what's like.
Hang in there!

Lots of love, JEnn

Jenn (25)
Shad (29)

Jaidyn, 4
"My PE/HELLP baby"
born @ 30 wks
2 lbs 12 oz

Natalia, 3 months
Born @ 38 weeks
Picture perfect pg!
6 lbs 6 oz
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Re : Boy preemies vs. Girl Preemies-UPDATED!

Postby aimeejane » Tue Mar 29, 2005 10:58 am

by aimeejane (589 Posts), Tue Mar 29, 2005 10:58 am

Caitlyn, I agree, TRY not to worry!! Nicky did AWESOMELY in the NICU, even though he is a white male.

Boy or girl, your little one will know how hard you're fighting for him/her, and that will make all the difference in how hard he/she fights. Good luck at your u/s!

Georgia State Coordinator
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Ds Nicky - 3/24/00 (28 wks - eclampsia)
Ds Kalen - 7/10/03 (36 weeks - preeclampsia)
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Re : Boy preemies vs. Girl Preemies-UPDATED!

Postby meg » Tue Mar 29, 2005 11:11 am

by meg (1384 Posts), Tue Mar 29, 2005 11:11 am

My family has had really good luck with preemie boys! My son was born at 35.4 weeks and had not problems or complications whatsoever. NO )2 at all, no blood sugar probelms, nothing. He roomed in with me from the first night. He did have a little problem learning to nurse but we got that worked out too. My sister had two preemie boys. Andrew was born at almost 30 weeks. He stayed in the NICU just 6-8 weeks ( cant remember for sure) but had relatively few complications. Her 2nd was born at just 27 weeks weighing 1 lb 9 ounces. He stayed in the hospital 3 months but had very very few complications while in the hospital and has done great ever since. We just celebrated his 1st birthday. Other than weight gain issues he is doing super and crawling and pulling-up etc!
Good luck to you and please keep us posted!!

Meg-Moderator for After Your Baby is Born
Will 2-6-00 (PE at 35 weeks 4 days)5lb 1 ounce
Elizabeth 7-3-01 (NO PE or PIH)8 lb 12 ounces
Katherine Grace 10-8-04, 6 lb 10 oz (oligo at 37.5 weeks but PIH/PE free)
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Re : Boy preemies vs. Girl Preemies-UPDATED!

Postby mom2tori » Tue Mar 29, 2005 11:16 am

by mom2tori (3842 Posts), Tue Mar 29, 2005 11:16 am

Those statistics are scary, and I think they put extra unneeded stress on mommies! We are worried enough without having to hear the numbers supporting or against us. I know it will be impossible for you not to worry but hopefully you will find a spot in your head and your heart where you are able to block out all of the worry and focus on getting that baby strong enough to pull through. I do wish you the best of luck and am anxious to hear how the ultrasound goes.

Alissa mommy to:
Dominic 9/10/97-9/11/97 @ 28 weeks
Victoria 1/8/02 @ 30 weeks
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Re : Boy preemies vs. Girl Preemies-UPDATED!

Postby emily kates mom » Tue Mar 29, 2005 11:17 am

by emily kates mom (130 Posts), Tue Mar 29, 2005 11:17 am

Please excuse my ignorance on this topic, but what are the exact statistics? I know from being in the NICU that boys tend to struggle more, but no one ever told me an exact number.

Allison (27)

Mommy to Emily Kate
Born 9/23/03, 3lbs 7.8oz
32.5 weeks
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Re : Boy preemies vs. Girl Preemies-UPDATED!

Postby fiona » Tue Mar 29, 2005 11:41 am

by fiona (5767 Posts), Tue Mar 29, 2005 11:41 am

I think it's easy to wrap yourself up in knots over statistics. I have had two boy preemies - one lived, one didn't, but my first was so adversely affected by the effects of pe, I don't honestly think it would have made a difference if he'd been a girl.

My 30-weeker boy went from strength to strength. Before I knew I was having yet another boy this time, I thought about all of this and, to be honest while I did think i might feel more confident if they told me I was having a girl, I also worried terribly at the prospect of passing on the chances of her having pe in the future (my mother had it with me).

The answer: to wait and see - you can't change anything, it's already a he or a she. I know not worrying is easier said than done, but somehow we have to zone ourselves out.

Good luck at the U/S - I hope everything looks just hunky-dory whether it's blue or pink!

dh Tom
ds Nate 12/8/97 - 14/8/97 26 weeks severe pre-e IUGR 1lb
ds Jay 4/11/98 30 weeks pre-e 3lbs 11 oz
no 3 due 15/6/05
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