I am just returning from the hospital where my baby girl died, and where I
I am just returning from the hospital where my baby girl died, and where I was also dying from HELLP Syndrome.
I'd had a full anatomy sonogram and an ammnio and they told me the baby was healthy. I was sick for the entire pregnancy- throwing up quite a lot and had headaches most days-but was grateful the baby was doing well. My blood pressure was high so the doctor was treating me with a lot of Labatelol. I was going in weekly for blood pressure checks, which seemed to be unaffected by the high amounts of medication I was on, but we checked the baby with sonograms and she seemed do be doing just fine.
In the 22nd week, I started to experience strong back and stomach pain, which I now know was caused my a malfunction in my liver and a constant nose-bleed which was because of the low platelets count. I thought these were just more pregnancy symptoms. At a family Christmas party, I was cramping and then started to spot. Luckily, I decided to call the doctor rather than wait for the end of the weekend. I went to the hospital where they found my platelets very low.
Things happened very quickly after that. They transferred me to another hospital, and it was then that I understood how sick I was. My doctor told me I had days, if not hours, to live and that they could not save the baby who'd apparently been poisoned for more than a week. (I was 5.5 months pregnant.) The hospital where they took me did a couple of procedures to get my cervix to dilate, and they pumped me full of magnesium to keep my pressure down. I was throwing up something black and bloodily and my nose wouldn't stop bleeding. The hospital prepared for a blood transfusion in case my platelet's were too low and I wouldn't clot after the operation.
They put me under general anesthesia and I delivered a baby girl who was about 1 pound and very sick. She died within minutes. When I woke up, I was swollen and still feeling toxic. They kept me on the magnesium for another 24 hours which affected my eye site and kept me pretty tired. Once I came off of it, and the risk of seizure had passed, I was much better.
My husband and I are still shell-shocked. It's been traumatic and we're just starting to understand not just that our daughter is dead, but that I am not able to carry healthy children to term.
I am grateful for this web site and for the stories. We're feeling very alone and frightened so it's good to know there are others out there who've been through the same thing.
Ethan will be turning 3 at the end of this month (October). The month of October always brings up some scary memories and emotions for me... I never thought I would have a difficult pregnancy or labor. After all...