My daughter Olivia May Hardy was stillborn at 11:15am31st January 2002, at 32 1/2 weeks.I
My daughter Olivia May Hardy was stillborn at 11:15am
31st January 2002, at 32 1/2 weeks.
I was almost 23 years old and my husband and I were extremely excited when we found out that we were pregnant. I didn't suffer from morning sickness, I had a healthy appetite and was feeling terrific. I loved being pregnant and the first time my husband felt our daughter kick at 16 weeks he cried.
Everything was normal and we were putting the finishing touches on her room before she was born.
The Monday before she was born I was laying on the couch talking to her feeling her kick.
On Tuesday I felt a bit off colour but I it was summer and warm so I rested all day. My appointment with my doctor was the next day. On Wednesday morning my husband went to work and I woke with the most excruciating headache. I suffer from migraines so I didn't think much of it. I rang my husband to come and take me to the doctors.
The rest is like a dream. My midwife took one look at me and said that I didn't have a migraine. I had +4 protien in my urine and my blood pressure was 210/120. She said that they would have to deliver the baby. My doctor came in and he couldn't find Olivia's heartbeat. My beautiful baby had died.
I was taken to hospital where I was hooked up to every IV known to man. I can't remember a lot about it only that our baby that was so wanted had died and that I was very sick.
I was induced and had Olivia the next morning.
She was perfect. Her placenta had stopped working and she died. There were no reasons, no warnings, nothing. I recovered quite quickly and was home in four days.
I still blame myself because there is no one else to blame. I'm still hurting and still angry that I don't have my baby. I'ts been almost 5 months since she died and I want to have more children but I'm so scared. Scared that my next baby will die, scared to put my husband through this again, scard that I'm not ment to have babies.
I know no one can answer my question of WHY?
Ethan will be turning 3 at the end of this month (October). The month of October always brings up some scary memories and emotions for me... I never thought I would have a difficult pregnancy or labor. After all...