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I am not sure why I am writing this other than you do not seem

Posted On Tuesday, October 29, 2002  by

I am not sure why I am writing this other than you do not seem to hear from too many fathers. I felt that it was important that I speak my mind for every other Father that does not.My wife and I lost our first child. He was born 15 weeks premature and was with us for about 39 hours. My experience with preeclamsia began when our regular doctor visit became a living hell. We were sent to a hospital that did not deal with our type of sickness and were airlifted across town.I cannot speak for all, but when your wife of less than a year is airlifted to anywhere you become so disoriented with life that you can hardly stand it. I had no idea what preeclampsia was or what it could do. Even my mother, who had 4 children of her own, knew nothing. Because I knew nothing, and I am extremely anal, I learned almost everything there was to know and that still was not enough. I will always remember the struggle that my wife went through and the struggle that I was not allowed to go through. When something like this happens to your better half it is indescribable to everyone else. You have no plan. That is difficult. You can accept her in a hospital and the doctors telling you that if we can do this and that and just keep your baby inside for another week or two then things are going to be great. Unfortunately, our son had to be delivered to protect my wife. Our son was born extremely happy and healthy, even the neonatal dr's were impressed with his strength and adaptability. Unfortunately again, after visiting with him for 36 hrs, and finally going to sleep, he took a nose dive and we were called to his bedside. Our son's lungs had given out, he was 1#6oz at birth and was to little to keep fighting. The biggest decision I had to make was to let our son go. It is not fair and I do not wish it on my worst enemy. The bottom line is I see a lot of help for women of preeclamsia but not for the men who love them. Please share my story, and God bless all who suffer from this disease.
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