Welcome to the boards
Sorry you had to find us, but glad you did. I think you will find great support here.
I did have the same feelings you did about the section. We were largely unaware of any BP issues until my induction, so I associated everything going wrong with my induction-turned-emergency-section. It doesn't help that it's major surgery and the recovery is awful! but your expectations (like every new mother's) were to have a normal pregnancy with a beautiful delivery - and who would expect less? So I've found that when those expectations are shattered, it's very disappointing, even depressing. And couple that with not understanding or knowing much about what happened to your body, and it can seem overwhelming to deal with for months (it was for me, anyway). I hope you can find peace through knowledge and support.
A little ray of hope for you (maybe? I hope so): I was also in a very dark place during my 2nd pregnancy when I thought I was headed for another section. I would just cry. I knew the experience wouldn't be as bad and, if I could actually have the memory of delivering a baby however it happened, that would be a better experience. But I just hated the thought of it. This is what our bodies are designed for and so often, medical interventions (the unnecessary kind, if you will) get in the way of perfectly normal deliveries (just my take on it). Certainly, I needed a section with my twins, but I was so sure that my body could handle a vaginal delivery the 2nd time around. Well, I was right! I had to prod my OB along a little, but I got my VBAC. It definitely helped some old wounds heal. Not everyone gets a VBAC, but I'm sure some other women can weigh in on those second sections and I am told they are not as bad after the first one.
Anna (28) - endometriosis
Hubby (27)Aidan & Jordan
- 7.2.09 at 36 weeks. Induction turned emergency c-section due to eclampsia. big healthy toddlers today!Asa
- 10.23.11 at 39 weeks. NO hypertensive issues!! successful VBAC