What started as mild cramping quickly turned into one of the hardest, most terrifying experiences of my life. I went to the hospital just to be safe, but as soon as I got there, I was rushed back—my blood pressure was 165/114. After some tests, I was diagnosed with HELLP syndrome. I was admitted on the spot and taken straight to labor and delivery. They told me I’d be having my baby within the next couple of days. My world stopped.

Everything moved so fast. I was hooked up to IVs and started on magnesium, blood pressure meds, antibiotics, and steroids. I was bed-bound with a catheter and felt completely trapped. The magnesium burned like fire through my veins and made me feel like I had the worst flu imaginable. I’ve never felt so miserable, helpless, and scared. I wasn’t just worried about me—I was terrified for my baby.

They had to induce me and manually break my water. When he was finally born, he weighed 5lbs 4oz. He was healthy, and I was so relieved—but they only let me see him for two minutes before taking him away. I had to wait ten hours before I could even hold my son again. I couldn’t get out of bed to go to him. It broke me. That separation was one of the most heartbreaking moments of my life.

I stayed in the hospital for another week while they tried to get my blood pressure under control. I was exhausted physically and emotionally. Even when I was discharged, the nightmare didn’t end. I was prescribed 800mg of blood pressure medication a day for two months, which made me constantly dizzy, foggy, and exhausted. Caring for a newborn under those conditions felt impossible at times. It was like being in a fog while life demanded I stay present and strong.

We’re okay now, thankfully—but that experience left a mark. I’m still terrified of getting pregnant again. The trauma, the fear, the physical pain—it changed me. No one really prepares you for this kind of birth story. It was hell. But I survived it. We survived it.